Lone Wolf | SIRIUS BLACK

Chapter Fifty

|    C H E E R   A M I D   M I S E R Y   |

December 24th, 1996

REMUS CONVINCED me to attend the Weasley's Christmas Party. Not that he had to do much convincing; I was pretty much sold on the idea already when I remembered that Harry would be there.

We hadn't spoken very recently, but I knew he was suffering just as much as I was.  We had both known loss at such young ages, although I at the very least had been surrounded by love from the very beginning.

Knowing full well that I couldn't go out and get myself an outfit for tonight, Remus and Tonks had gone to get one for me.  The dress was a soft crushed velvet, and coloured a plum purple that worked well in contrast to the flame of my hair, which I curled and pulled away from my face.  I got ready to go without protest, and didn't show any kind of worry until we'd arrived at the Weasley house.

Their home was a tower, if I had to come up with a way to describe it.  I had never seen any structure quite like it.  House upon house were stacked until the Weasley home reached the sky.  It was an impressive building feat, that was for sure. Looking at it, though, I didn't think I would be able to go above the ground floor.

"Oh, Remus!  It's good to see you!  And Tonks, good to see you dear!"  Molly Weasley bustled out of her home, onto the expansive land it was built upon.  She had an apron printed densely with flowers tied to her waist, and her bright flame of hair, not dissimilar to mine, bounced on her shoulders as she came closer.

Remus reached out to me and threaded his fingers through mine.  That tiny reassurance was all that I needed to know that this was okay, we were going to have a good time.

After all, I lived before Sirius.  I couldn't let his death be mine too.

"And Cassie, dear!"  Molly yanked me into a hug, possibly the tightest I'd had in my life.  Remus gave a quiet chuckle when I shot him a surprised look over Molly's shoulder.  "How are you— oh I shouldn't ask that question!  Come inside."

So we went in.  Everyone was there.  All of the Weasley children, along with Molly's husband Arthur, and Fleur, Bill's girlfriend from Beauxbatons.  And of course, the person I was most looking forward to seeing, Harry.  He was sitting with Ginny and Ron on the couch, though Ron didn't exactly look to have been invited to sit there. Ginny kept shooting her brother upset glances, while Ron pretended to be oblivious.

My best guess was that big brother duties had beckoned him.  Well, he'd probably come to the realization soon enough that his sister was allowed to be with his best friend, weird as it seemed. After all, James punched Sirius in the face the first time he learned that we had kissed but it hadn't taken long before he was cheering our relationship on, along with Lily and Remus.

Harry got up when he saw me.  I expected him to just be cordial, since maybe he blamed me partly for Sirius's death, the same way I had blamed him for it in my mind after the fact.

I wasn't prepared for him to throw his arms around me.  But when he did, I found myself embracing him fiercely.

"Well isn't that sweet," Molly awed behind us.  "Let's all give them a moment.  Come along, Ginny.  Ron, you as well."

When it was just Harry and I in the living room, I hugged him again, and I was sure some tears escaped from my eyes, though I tried to prevent them.  It was hard not to be emotional, when he was taller, his voice deeper, his eyes tinged with sadness that he worked to hide. There was some part of me that resented not being there for him everyday, so I wouldn't be startled by how much he had grown when I saw him. So that I could hear about school and make dinner and be the guardian I had promised 'someday' to when he'd been a baby.