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Pen Your Pride

Chapter 22: When the days are cold

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Narrator’s POV

The sun was shining, the birds were singing and the day was bright, but the occasion you were attending was far from that. People were crying as they walked along the grass, following behind the men that were carrying Suho’s casket.

His mother depended on his father for support because if he left her, she would have collapsed to on the ground and continued to sob. You watched everyone with blurry eyes due to the tears and followed quietly. You knew that Suho did not want you to cry, but who could blame you, right?

Your best friend passed away, so of course you would cry.

The funeral went along and the ceremony began. When it was time for the eulogy, your name was called up and you took a deep breath in, before walking to the front.

You felt nervous, but this was what Suho wanted you to do as a last favour. Looking at the sad faces, you felt obliged in cheering them up, even at this remorseful event.

“If Suho was here, I think he’d laugh at how we all look like right now,” you began, causing some to chuckle faintly. “There are times when we really love a person, no matter if they’re a close friend or a partner. There are times when the unexpected things happen and they take us by surprise. But, everything has a reason; everything that occurs in the world has a purpose. Things happen because they have been planned, even if the result is good or bad. It is because of this that I believe Suho was taken early, he was made to be better and now he is. Now, he’s up there as an angel, watching over all of us… forever. He never really believed that he was capable of doing the things he wanted to do, I always had to encourage him, but that was what made him him. His shy personality made him the nicest, kindest, and sweetest person ever. No matter how else people saw him, that’s how I saw him. I wish he was given more time than what he got, but not all wishes get granted. All I know is that I am very thankful for him and I hope to see him one day when my own time comes.”

You tried to fight the tears that wanted to escape, but in this battle, you lost. They streamed down your cheeks like gentle waterfalls and you hurried in getting back to your seat.

After the funeral, all you wanted was to curl up in your bed and cry. Seeing your best friend lying down with his eyes shut close forever in the casket made you so sad that you, yourself, did not feel like living anymore.

When you got home, a car waited for you outside and you knew too well who it was. Ignoring it, you carried on to heading to the door and the car door opened, revealing its owner. So, quickly, you got out your keys, trying to find the right one.

Suddenly, you felt a grip on your arm and it brought you by surprise.

“______, can I talk to you?” he asked.

“Isn’t that what you’re doing right now?” you replied coldly.

“Look, I know it was really stupid of me to do what I did to you, but you have to believe me. At first it was only a joke, but I started to like you and I didn’t—”

“Sehun, please, I am not in the mood,” you interrupted.

“Can’t you at least listen to what I have to say?” he asked.

“For what? So you can try to persuade me into thinking that what you felt for me was real? No, thank you, I think I’ll pass.”

Sehun could not say anything further after that. The silence sent your heart to beat faster and you do not know why. You were afraid that if it beat any faster, Sehun might hear the sound and you would have to explain to him why.

Sighing in relief to finally finding the key, you unlock the door and head inside, closing the door behind you. You slide down the door and sat there, pinning your ear against the door to check if Sehun has left.

“I’m not leaving until you talk to me,” he said.

You huffed in irritation and continued to sit there, anyway, without him knowing that you were there.

-

It has been at least an hour and you could still hear Sehun’s faint breathing from the other side of the door. The bad part was, it started to rain half an hour ago, and you began to feel sorry for him.

You wanted the guy to suffer, not to die.

You did not want to let him in, but you had lost your inter-battle with yourself and sighed in defeat as you stood up and, slowly, opened the door. Sehun rose to his feet and you could see his mouth shaking in cold.

“Come in,” you say.

Sehun took no hesitation in entering and immediately ran to your bedroom, plopping himself under the covers. You carefully followed him and leaned on your door frame as you raise an eyebrow.

“Uh, what are you doing?” you ask him.

“I need to keep warm or else I’ll get sick,” he answered,

You just nodded because you could not really argue with what he said. Instead, you went in your bathroom, getting your change of clothes, and got changed. When you got out, you found that Sehun was asleep and so you walk silently beside him on the bed.

You bent down and examined his face. Your eyes trailed from his hair and down to his lips, then you shook your head asking what in the world you are doing. Suddenly, Sehun grabbed your arm and you are forced to lie down with him.

At that moment, you felt like the first time you were at his house when you had to tutor him; the same thing happened in which he had pulled you towards him, but only that this time he did not mean any joke.

“Gosh, Sehun, you’re freezing cold,” you say worriedly.

“I’m fine, I’ll be warm in a minute and then I can leave,” he said.

You bit your bottom lip as you sat up straight on the bed, turning your body to look at Sehun, with eyes still shut close.

“I just feel sorry for you right now, you know? I don’t forgive you. In fact, I don’t think I ever will,” you tell him.

“Yeah, I know,” he said, his tone sounding sad.

“I’ll be downstairs, just leave when you’re warm enough,” you informed him.

You headed out your bedroom and downstairs to the living room, where you decided to watch comedy movies instead, to divert your attention from Suho’s funeral. But, nothing seemed to work. It appeared like even the funniest movie could not cheer you up right now.

While it was half way through the movie, a knock was heard from the door so stood up to answer it. Your eyes widened in aghast and you gulped in terror as you find Sehun’s mother standing right in front of you.

“I need to talk to you,” she said.

- - - - - - - - - -

I feel sorry for Sehun-ah TT.TT LEL.

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