"so this is me swallowing my pride, standing in front of you saying, "I'm sorry for that night." it turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you. wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine."
~ Taylor Swift
I was walking down the streets of my hometown, I didn't need to look where I was going and even though I haven't been here for a long time, I still knew all the streets and stores. I wore a black hoodie to cover my hair and some shades to hide my eyes because I didn't want to be recognized, I just wanted to be on my own. It felt wrong to walk through those streets without her, when we used to have so much fun here. I couldn't stop wondering where she was. Even after a year I missed her so much. Every time I or the band accomplished something I wanted to tell her but then I remembered that she wasn't here anymore. Did she move on? Did she found a new guy that made her happy? I hoped she didn't even if it was selfish.
This year has been crazy: We released our first album and went on a Europe and America tour. But still there's no place like home and I was quite nervous to play tonight. The boys and I were even closer than before and I loved it to have them around me. I knew that Ashton sometimes talked to her (I heard them again on the phone one day) and I wished it was me that she was talking to, not him. I wrote her E-Mails every week to tell her what's been going on and how much I missed her but she never wrote back, I didn't even know if she even read them but it made me feel like we were back in school and writing to each other for that project.
As I was thinking about her, somebody walked into me or I probably walked into them and I stumbled back a bit and I mumbled a "Fuck! I'm so sorry I didn't see you." I didn't really look at the person who fell on the floor, I didn't even care, but I held my hand out for the stranger to take and to get up. As the person took my hand I felt a tingling sensation on my skin, which I used to have when Emily held my hand, so I quickly let go as the person (which I realized was a girl) brushed the dirt of her wine-red skirt and checked her knees for scratches. She was cute. The same height as Emily, her skin tanner than hers had been and the hair probably a bit longer and lighter than Emily's but it was difficult to say, since she had her hair in a side braid and a wine-red bandana in it. I shook my head to get rid of my thoughts and apologized again. "I'm really sorry. I was somewhere else with my thoughts."
Her head snapped up and the air was knocked out of my lungs. This girl didn't just look like Emily. This was Emily. Holy shit! Her green eyes locked at me in shock and her mouth was opened in astonishment. I probably looked similar with my mouth opening and closing until I finally could whisper her name. My voice broke and I was shaking with nerves but she was so beautiful. She had always been but now as I saw her for the first time since that day her beauty hit me again. The tan she had developed looked amazing on her, she had more freckles on her face and she looked a bit older and more mature but all in all it was still Emily. My Emily. A strand of her hair had escaped from her braid and I shakily moved my hand towards her face to move it away. Her skin was so soft, like I remembered it and I think she leaned into my touch a bit. There were tears in her eyes and she looked scared when she spoke. But the only think that escaped her mouth was my name.
Her voice was like a melody to my ears and I hadn't heard it for too long. I wanted her to talk to me non-stop and smile at me and probably even love me again but I knew that I had to take it slow. I had to do this the right way. I couldn't lose her again when I just found her.
"Would you like to have something to drink with me? Just to talk about stuff?" I thought that would be a good start and when she slowly nodded I wanted to jump around in joy but I kept my cool and lead her to the next restaurant. We didn't talk during the walk and my brain still tried to realize that it was really her that I met again in the streets of Sydney. When we sat down at a table and ordered something to drink I took a deep breath to calm myself down and asked her: "Why are you here?"
"I live here." "Here? In Sydney?" That couldn't be true. All those months I looked for her in every place we went but she has been here in my home town all the time. "No, in L.A. Of course here in Sydney." I couldn't help but smile at her sarcastic comment, that's how I remembered her.
Now that she was in front of me I realized how much I really missed her because that's how it should have been all this months ago: Me and her together, on some random, cute dates, laughing and in love with each other.
I couldn't believe that she really moved to Australia. I mean she told me that she wanted to move after graduation but I didn't think she would do it since it was me she wanted to move here for and I had hurt her. But I was incredibly happy that she still did move down here.
"How have you been?" This was a risky question since now she could either tell me that she was so happy with her new boyfriend or she could scream at me for making her feel like shit. But she did neither of those when she answered shortly: "Alright. Have been better." And I felt so bad because if it wasn't for me she probably would feel better. "Em. I'm so sor-" "Don't", she interrupted me, "just don't. I already read enough of your apologies in your mails." She read them! She really read my mails, I didn't thought she would. "Okay. So what are you doing now? Like are you working or are you at uni? Tell me what has been going on in your life." I knew that this was a bit forward but I really wanted to know what I had missed. "Well, there's not much to say. I'm studying History and English at university. I live with a friend of mine, Lea. I work in a book store to earn some money. That's it. Your life is much more exciting than mine." That may be true, I mean I got to see a lot of places and do some really cool stuff but I still wished I could have been with her when she graduated, when she moved here and started uni or meet her new friends. I just wished I could spent those days with her and not alone in a plane or a bus. "Y'know, my life isn't that special either." She just huffed and looked at me like she wanted to say "are you serious". Oh, I missed this look. I smiled at her but then I asked her the question I was the most nervous for, the question that could break me:
"So..Ehmm...Do you, like, have a boyfriend at the moment?" She raised her eyebrows and leaned back in her chair. "No, I don't. Why?" I breathed out the air I was holding. I was so relieved because that meant that I probably still had a chance to get her back. "I...I just wanted to know. Anyway, would you like to come to the concert we're playing tonight? I mean... the boys would love to see you and I'd love to see you again too." She looked down at her hands to hide the cute blush that formed on her cheeks and I smiled proudly at the effect that I still had on her. "I don't know, I need to work this afternoon." My heart sunk at that, she wouldn't come and I'd probably never see her again. "But I could ask if I can leave earlier." Immediately a huge smile formed itself on my face and I looked at her with hopeful eyes. "You'd do that?" "I can try. I'll text you if I can come, yeah? You still have the same number?" I nodded enthusiastically and my stomach flipped at the fact that she still had my number and that I'd see her again tonight. "Okay. I need to leave now. It was nice seeing you again, I guess. So I'll see you tonight maybe." "Yeah. I really hope you can come." With that I leaned in and kissed her cheek, which made her blush again and she mumble a short "bye, Luke" when she walked out of the restaurant.
I nearly skipped back to the hotel the boys and I were staying at and I couldn't wait to tell them my news. Just as I was about to open my room door my phone vibrated in my pocket and I immediately took it out to see if Emily had texted me. And it was indeed her. I couldn't contain the not so manly squeak as I read her words:
Can leave earlier. See you at the concert. I'll be in the front row. ;) E. x
This was probably the best day of my life. I found her again, she was coming to my concert and if everything turned out well she'll eventually give me another chance (at least I hoped so). There were four hours left until the concert started so I needed to get ready. Everything had to be perfect for tonight...
HI! Again I'm so sorry that I didn't update the last weeks, I hope this makes up for it a bit, even though it's short and probably sucks.
Anyway this story only has about 1 or 2 chapters left, depending on if I do an epilogue or not (should I do one?). I'm somehow sad that it's nearly over. :(
BUUUUUT, I have an idea for another story, in which Ashton would be the main character. Would you guys read it??
Apart from that, tell me what you thought about that chapter. Do you think they'll come back together or not?
vote, comment or share please.
Love you all to the moon and back. j'
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Lots of Love (Luke Hemmings)Fanfiction
When Emilys class starts a pen-pal project with a class from Australia she meets Luke. The shy boy with no friends meets the friendly girl from the UK that hides all her problems behind a smile. But can they fall in love just by writing to eachother?