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Pen Your Pride

I hate Mondays

16 1 0

Don't hex the messenger. 

There are always lousy bits to any job & this was the worst part of his, James thought.It was an aspect of the job he prayed he never got used to like taking the piss outta the underling who got shoved on night patrol on the weekends. That would have been better than standing in front of this door waiting for someone to open it so that he could with one sentence destroy their day & change their lives forever. He expected with a house this size the family inside would be rich, cultured & pure blood. The door opened and looking down he saw an elf, a house elf. This one had clothes, the kind that would give you a headache if you looked at the person for too long. "Harry potter, Friend to all house elves?" The elf asked. He asked all this in one sentence. James was used to people who didn't know him mistaking him for his dad. The elf looked so hopeful. He shook his head and said" No, sorry. That's my dad."

The elf instead of deflating seemed to start vibrating. James was about to ask what was wrong when the elf pulled a black square from his pocket and looked at it. He put the box close to his head & spoke' yes mistress?" James looked around confused. They were alone.' It is the son of Harry potter, Igzy has not had the honour of meeting one such as the generous Potters before, can Igzy give the little Potter some of Igzy's special for special people liquid that mistress loves so much?' James didn't know what to object to first in that statement, little Potter sounded too close to Potty & as for the special liquid? Who in Merlins name knew what the hell that was?  Either way James was going to decline very politely. His mind made up he was startled again by a distinct pop. There stood a woman; she too had a black box up to her ear. ‘Thank you Igz. We will have some in the drawing room.' She looked at me the entire time & I swear her eyes shone with amusement. Smiling she came forward till she stood in front of me & held her hand out.' Miranda Merrick, you are of course James potter, please come with me.' She turned and not waiting to see if I would follow, she walked through a long hallway. Her heels echoed on the tile. Click,click,click. I found the sound so annoying, it added to my headache. She stepped into a room & turned. Her smile still in place ‘please sit.' I complied; this wouldn't make a difference. 'Mrs Merrick, I'm afraid I have some bad news'

James began only to be interrupted by a pop. There stood Igzy, carrying a tray he bowed to James & smiled at his mistress. Igzy didn't seem like the elves aunt Mione had talked about. He didn't look under fed or scared or even docile for that matter. 'That will be all Igzy thank you'. Mrs Merrick smiled and I was sure she was holding back laughter. Iggy continued to stand there & just look at James. His staring was becoming uncomfortable. Just as he was about to ask Iggy what was wrong, someone screamed' NO!!!!!! Please stop, help Terror help!!!!!' James jumped to his feet and was out the door before either of the rooms other occupants could react. He was running towards the screaming which was getting louder,' Aaaaaaaaa, no, please no, please, Terror won't do it again, I swears please stop, it burns, stop!!!!' As the begging turned into utter distress, I could feel myself getting closer; I turned the corner and braced myself for the horror behind the door. James charged in and skidded to a halt. Everyone in the room looked up startled by his sudden appearance. He barely had time to register that they were in a rather large bathroom, when something latched onto his leg, he never saw it move. 'Save me Harry Potter, save me!!!!!' The thing latched to his leg screamed.

I looked up as someone else screamed 'Shut the door.' I heard more curses coming from what looked like a ball of armour twisting in the corner. I saw hair first, blonde, the armour twisted & rose. Standing I saw it was a female. She looked pissed. I felt a tug on my leg & looked down to see Iggy pulling the thing off my leg. ‘Let’s go of the little Potter, terror you must.' Terror held on tighter. Someone was laughing behind James; he turned his head only to see Mrs Merrick & some bloke, laughing their heads off. The sound came from the guy. He was doubled over. ‘Merlin this never gets old.' I was still confused.

I clutched my wand tighter; I had pulled it out on my sprint through the halls looking for the victim of the screams. Terror screamed again, ‘saves poor Terror tiny potty saves him.’ That set the bloke of behind me again. Potty? Really. 'Iggy is so sorry, little Potter, Iggy will take Terror now.' He said it like a man facing his executioner.

I noticed that the other occupants had been moving slowly towards me, Iggy and the ball attached to my leg. I saw their faces and had only seconds to brace for impact as they all pounced on the three of us. I fell backward & hit the tile. The sound echoed across the bathroom. I felt the impact in every part of my body.

My head took the brunt of the fall. I had a second to register the pain, then I felt myself floating through the air & I felt like I was falling only to land splat in water? 'What the hell??' I opened my mouth to scream, when my mouth filled with water and soap? Gagging, I pushed to the surface, only to find myself hanging upside down, soaking wet. The ball was still attached to my leg screaming his head off,' it burns don't no, stop no, stop!!!' Don't please potty save me, save terror potty, save him, potty, potty, potty, saves terror!!!!'

This was getting old fast. What the hell was wrong with these people? I was done.

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