So this is the cubicle I've been working from for the last few days. It's nice, isn't it? Especially when it's light out.
If any of you are from an eastern time zone, you might notice the time at which this is being posted. 3 am...that's right. That's how long I've been working.
I have never, ever had a week this long and hard with studying and it's only Tuesday/Wednesday. Tbh, I don't even know what day it is anymore. I just know when lab, german, physics, calculus, and engineering are.
This week has been cold, miserable, and I think tonight broke me. I mean, yeah, the appeal of being the badass who's willing to go the extra mile and spend the whole night in the library working on shit do is great.
But like, when I went back I was miserable. So here, the idea is this. What kind of person stays in the library until past 2:30? (I realize, FYI that most of what I'm saying is probably gibberish at this point)
Well, imagine a girl, sitting in an chair, working for hours, arguing with her lab group about how to put data into their group lab report. She's been typing a 4 page report, which even though she's spilled out everything she knows about acids and bases (the part of chemistry that makes the most sense to her) is probably trash. She's finally finished. So she goes on her way, passing the closed Starbucks in the library on her way out.
So she goes on her way, basically alone save for a few souls also who are try-hards, staying up until the break of dawn to maintain 4.0s, scholarships, or even prevent academic probation. And then suddenly, she's alone. In the space that's normally lively on the massive hill towards her dorm, she's alone, and even the Wendy's is closed.
She trudges up to her dorm, everything soaked and mushy at her feet, and the whole freezing. It's at which point that she goes back to her dorm, she sees decorations in her room, and all she wants to do is scream. It's not that the decorations are bad. It's just that she'd rather be putting them up than going to bed so late.
So yeah, I'm like 100% miserable from all the work and I'm ranting about. Sorry if that offends you guys. It's been a long day. Here's the list of what's been done:
- woke up at 8:00 am and registered for classes
-bought a new notebook and pencil
- read another entry on the livestream list and took notes
-made some friends
-completed math homework
-completed physics homework
-went to chemistry
-managed not to fall asleep in calc
-talked to an old friend after two long years
-rallied the group for the group lab report
-edited group lab report
-went to annex to study calc
-studied calc for an hour with other person
-watched professor Leonard for 2+ hours about spherical coordinates
-got dropped off at the library
-continued to mess with group lab report
-read for 15 min(because I was going insane about this point)
-wrote individual lab report
Honestly though. C's get degrees. Why do I try so hard? Tbh I completely neglected to watch the *two hour movie* our german professor assigned us because at the point I finished my lab report I was done.
I just want to eat my feelings and curl up with hot chocolate...or better yet just not go to the football game this weekend and curl up in bed for the entire weekend...
Maybe I shouldn't be complaining. But I'm going to fail my calc test if I don't put like 6+ hours into studying. And honestly I can't handle all the BS being thrown at me. I'm probably going to snap tomorrow if our engineering professor gives us required exam practice again.
We will see. Meanwhile, the weather continues to get colder and so does my mood. (It's german weather FYI, in the 40s and raining...soon it might be snow and then I'll be even more miserable)
I'm going to borrow a line from RedPandaWorld
Hoping for a pandastic miracle
Please someone just make me feel better.