Chapter 49

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There was trash everywhere. The apartment looked like it had been very lived in.

It wasn't much but it's home for now

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It wasn't much but it's home for now. With the help of magic I know I can make it a home. If I can transform a room in an orphanage, then I can do anything. Our days at the orphanage were hard, but at least I had him. I was so dependent on Tom it terrified me to be alone. Just like that I'm down again at the thought of him. Joey Luna had no problems handing this place off to me. It probably saved him money in getting someone to clean it up. I sighed and took a look around. "It will have to do," I said as I took out my wand. I'm just happy he agreed to give us a place to stay. This is paradise compared to the streets or terrified in the nursery of my previous home.

In the days to follow I was painting the walls muggle style. It gave me a feeling of normality and I was so proud of myself whenever I did something I used to think would be impossible on my own. I sang along to the music on the record player as I set up our new home. I had forgot how much I enjoyed signing. I forgot a lot of the things I enjoyed before Tom came into my life. Being alone here is an enjoyable liberation at times. I can do anything or be anything I want. Other times it's very difficult being alone. In the middle of the night I get frightened at any sound and I begin to miss the feeling of security I used to have when I was laying beside the darkest wizard of all time. He was everything to me. Tom was the one person I could look to no matter how dark the day was. He was the flame that kept me warm through the harsh winter, and the strong arms that held me when things went wrong. I really thought we'd be together forever because he told me we would be. I closed my eyes and I saw him, he was laughing and holding our twins in his arms. In that moment he was so beautiful, like the angel I had believed saved me. I wanted nothing more than for him to be that person once more. I had noticed him change over the course of a few months until he was nearly unrecognizable. A tear left my eyes as I took notice of the bracelet on my wrist and the ring on my finger. I hadn't been able to bring myself to take them off, but as I look around my new home I'm slowly fixing up I have a sudden surge of independence, like I can finally be my own person. I can be whoever I want to be. I'm not the wife of Tom Marvolo Riddle, I'm Roslyn a loving mother and a free spirit. It's time to find myself no matter how difficult I may see it. Slipping off the ring I stared at it for a second before taking off my bracelet. Looking at the two items in my hand I looked in the mirror and felt like a whole new person. My eyes caught sight of the horcrux necklace around my neck and in a split second I ripped it off. This isn't me, not any more and it will forever be my biggest regret. He did this to me and I'll spend my life trying to undo it. Everything that reminds me of Tom has a speacial place in the back of the closet. It's time to woman up and stop this toxicity from consuming me.

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Transfiguration is truly a great thing. Old curtains easily become a brand new pink duvet, and dusty old rugs become brand new drapes. The small flat is almost my perfect home. I would never have the spare money to waste on furniture so thank goodness I'm a witch. The candy store agreed to hire me and it would seem that everything was coming together, but it was harder than expected. I spent long hard nights scrubbing the floor of the shop and even then it was difficult to pay the rent and other bills. Taking care of my twins and working is probably the hardest thing I've ever done. All I can do is hope for a way out of this mess. The nights are the hardest. I can hardly sleep when his memory is stuck swimming in my brain. He's out there doing what he's always wanted, and I doubt he ever wonders about the kids and I. Perhaps one day I'll finally be given a break but for now I have to struggle in order to get where I need to be.
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He's so handsome, I thought as I admired Tom as he held our daughter in his arms. He enjoyed her reaction when he'd show her magic. Sometimes he'd make things smaller or larger, or accio her toys to him, he'd draw pictures in the air and she'd watch in amazement as the bright images appeared out of nowhere. It makes me so happy to see him like this. He seemed so carefree and happy. We were perfect, he was perfect, but all good things come to an end. In a split second he was Voldemort, a monstrous creature. He was no longer the handsome boy I had devoted my life to but an angry monster. He wanted nothing more than to hurt us. He was once so beautiful, but then I woke up.

I gasped and sat up quickly. A cry was coming from the other room. I ran my fingers through my hair and took a deep breath seeing that it was 5am nearly time for me to get up for work. Even my dreams are plagued with his memory. Sometimes I wish I could just forget about him, but then i'd never know how strong love could be. This heart break isn't equivalent to anything I've been through, but when I think of how good he use to be to me I'd never want to forget those times. Life is hard I know that much, but love and loss is harder. I will spend my life loving a monster and I'll never forget his smile. It was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. If only I could turn back time like I had once before and stop him from becoming this monster. I'm so afraid that he's too far gone to ever stop this. I had thought that my love was enough to prevent this, but it just wasn't enough. Nothing would ever be enough. What had caused this? How could he just not love me anymore after all we've been through together?

When I died and my curse reversed his and his did the same to mine I gave him the ability to love, and it's like it's been taken away once more. The way he acted was just like he did when I first met him. Was it possible my curse only my lifted his for a short time? Then it hit me....
I was never supposed to come back to life. His curse was lifted when I died out of love for him and our children. I upset the balance of things and now the universe has equalized itself. By choosing to live I took away the one thing that could fix Tom Riddle. He's still the man I fell in love with, but the universe has regulated the situation by pulling us apart. I was never meant to experience life's great happiness and he was never meant to experience love because of what our parents had done to us. We thought we had fixed things, but it seems like things had just gotten more difficult. How can I save Tom from himself if he doesn't believe he needs to be saved? He is a loveless goon who doesn't care what has happened. Is it possible that this is what has happened? Can it be reversed? It has to. None of this makes any sense. Why has his curse returned to him but not me if this is the case. Either way I'm not going to let Tom's curse or dark nature get the best of him. I know him better than anyone else and there is a good husband and father inside him. I vowed to stay with him for better or for worse and I won't let him ruin himself. I'm going to get our love back somehow even if I have to die for it. I have a feeling I'm going to have to break a lot of rules, but I will figure this out no matter the sin.

The End

Next chapter is a bonus chapter with facts about the story!

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Next chapter is a bonus chapter with facts about the story!

THE SEQUEL HAS BEEN PUBLISHED AND IT'S CALLED "SINS OF THE MOTHER"

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I started writing this story when I was 15 or 16 on quotev and I only brought it to Wattpad a few months ago and I've gotten so much support and nothing but great feedback about it and I am so thankful for that. So here it is the official ending of the very first book in the "Sins" trilogy I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

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