Prompt: Kaz and Killian run into Tanner
"I don't think your mom likes me," Kaz said.
"Probably because you suck my dick. Also, you stole her earrings," I said.
"She didn't know I stole them," Kaz said.
"She knows you have a stealing problem. I'm sure she figured it out," I said. "Speaking of stealing, Casimir Warrick where the actual fuck is my cell phone."
"In your pocket, dumbass. I stole your coupon for pizza, not your phone," Kaz said, holding up the coupon. "You're just too stupid to remember what pocket you put your phone in."
"Oh. Well, this is awkward and uncomfortable," I said, slapping my own ass until I found my phone in my back left pocket. "There it is. I'd call and order us a pizza, but I can't afford it without my coupon."
"How fat are you, Malley? We're going to get sandwiches right now," Kaz said.
"And what goes better with sandwiches than pizza? That's what I thought, you coupon stealing asshole," I said, trying and failing to snatch my coupon from him.
He waved it just out of my reach. "I gotcha a dollar."
I glared at him. "I'm the one who brings back shitty commercial quotes. Don't steal my personality."
"Thief," he reminded, handing me the coupon.
I tucked it into my pocket, knowing it would go missing again at some point. Damn klepto boyfriend.
We entered the little sandwich shop together and went up to order. Kaz was staying at my house for the weekend, though we were under strict orders from my parents to keep my bedroom door open at all times. Jokes on you mom and dad; I'm a relentlessly thirsty force and no open doors are going to stop me from blowing my boyfriend other places.
Okay, chill Killian. We'd been doing the cute boyfriend stuff too, like cuddling, cooking together, having all my personal belongings mysteriously go missing, and talking late into the night about our future together.
Even now, Kaz carried our sandwiches as I picked out a table for us. We sat down across from each other, feet touching under the table.
"We can go to the movies tomorrow," I offered. "Then use my pizza coupon to get dinner."
"You mean my pizza coupon?" he said, holding it up.
"Oh my god," I said. "Do that one more time and I'm yeeting myself back to the Academy so one of the teachers can beat me to death with a ruler and I won't have to deal with you anymore." I picked up my sandwich and frowned, lifting the bread. "You stole my fucking lettuce?"
"Oh, no, I'm not that talented. I just switched our sandwiches on accident," he said, swapping them. "I hate lettuce on my sandwiches. Waste of precious stomach space."
"My crunchy water and I will have a good time and you're not invited," I said, biting in to my sandwich.
I froze and painfully swallowed down the food I'd half chewed. I coughed a little before turning to face Tanner.
"Oh, uh, hey there," I said, setting my sandwich down. "Long time no see. It's me, your fuckboy."