I'm A Monster - Wolfstar

35

I tear up blades of grass vigorously, preventing the tears from escaping my eyes. I cry too much, especially nowadays. My straight face wobbles. I press my palms against my eyes and carry on ripping up the grass.
We're sat in a small woodland by our neighbourhood, the only place I could think of where we'd be alone.
"It's OK", he says.
"It's not! He doesn't normally get like that and the argument heated up so quickly and I should never have brought you here in the first place because now you'll be getting expelled because of me!"
"I'm such an idiot", he sighs. "I had taken my wand downstairs with me as a joke, but then when he started shouting at you I got scared and when he pulled his wand out I thought he was going to...". He shakes his head and leans further against the tree we're sat against. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to but... what was that about him telling you all to die?"
I go silent, and he doesn't press the question.
"When I was four, he was dealing with Fenrir Greyback, the werewolf. He had been taken in for questioning for killing two muggle children. In that moment he had told him that all werewolves...", I stop a moment as a tear rolls down my cheek, "All werewolves deserve nothing but death. He had escaped that night and snuck in through the window. He was in wolf form, so naturally I just thought it was a bad dream until he started attacking me and it actually hurt. Me becoming a lycanthrope was his cruel turn on a revenge act"
"That's... That's evil", he says, frowning. I don't say anything. "Why would he tell you he said that though?"
"He didn't, I was sneaking downstairs one night for a biscuit or something when I heard him telling Mum all this. I think I was six or seven"
"Oh"
"I'm more worried about you, Sirius. You're going to get expelled. You're not allowed to use magic outside of school"
Just as I mention the subject, an owl flutters down and perches on a low branch next to him, a letter tied to his leg. The envelope is sealed with red wax with the Hogwarts logo imprinted on it.
"It's from Dumbledore. Probably saying who's gonna take my place in our dorm", he laughs nervously. He rips it open but sighs and doesn't take the letter out. "I'm too scared. You do it"
His hands are trembling as I take the faded brown envelope in my own. I take the paper out and see it's just a normal letter, but I don't know if that's a bad thing or not. I make to unfold it and catch my eyes on his; he nods.

Mr Sirius .O. Black
Only one day after you have left Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, you have used magic outside of school. You used the defensive spell "Protego" after an older wizard of age tried to use an offensive spell on you.
This would normally lead to being permanently excluded, or expelled, but because of the situation in which the spell was used you will be let off. However, the next time you use magic off school grounds and the Hogwarts Express, you will immediately be forbidden from entering the school again without question.
Yours sincerely,
Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster

"Wow, I got let off way better than I thought I would". He sighs with relief and happily rips the letter up into little bits, letting them slowly float away in the breeze.
The owl from Dumbledore flies away, but as soon as that leaves our sight another comes from the opposite direction. I recognise it as Dad's, and he lands carefully on my arm when I hold it out and whistle to get his attention.
"Hey, Godric!"
"Godric?"
"Like Godric Gryffindor. Dad bought him for us to send letters to each other when I came home for my first Christmas holiday"
"OK then, Godric it is"
I untie the letter loosely wrapped around one of his claws and read it.

Your father has gone upstairs. I've had a talk with him and he's guilty about what he's said and done to you both.
Mum x

I show it to him and he raises his eyebrows. I stand up, brushing a few fallen leaves off my hoodie and jeans.
"Are you going to talk to him?", he asks as we start making our way out of the forest.
I shrug. "Probably not"