little dragonfly

part 12

- Who the hell I'm supposed to think you are?

- I'm the same as 5 minutes ago.

Then I felt full of fury, I took the documents and I throw them, and I moved closer to him.

- you are not. You are just a liar, the biggest one I've never met. How could you?

- I was not lying.

- will you say me that you felt in love with me? Will you say me that our history is magic?

- noisy

- SHUT UP! When was it supposed to finish? Me behind the door of a jell, and you in the other side, loving each other without limits? Was that your fantasy?

- no

- yeah, that's true, you wouldn't be there. And you have never loved me.

- that's not true, Alice.

- so what's the true?

- I'm fucking in love with you.

I put the gun touching his head.

- tell me that I'm not work, that you would come with me wherever I went.

He kept in silence.

- Tell me!

He didn't say anything.

- you can't. You don't fucking can.

He looked at my eyes and I changed the direction, now, pointing to my head.

- Alice, don't do that.

- yeah, because, then, you will never know where my father is.

- I don't fucking mind your father, he was a stupid man, that left you in a sickness situation, that you will never go out, and that's horrible, yes, but I can help you.

- I'm not sick.

- but you look like.

- you're a liar.

- I'm not

- but you look like.

And then, I took my pistol and I left, knowing that he will probably not follow me, because of if I tryied to kill myself.

Once in the street I started running, to nowhere, and then, I found a building, where probably some years ago happened a fire, it was empty, with no cameras and so big, the perfect place for thinking in peace.
But, the truth is that I didn't think about anything, I felt asleep on the floor, tired of crying.

When I woke up, all my reallity came to me. I was alone, in the street, with anyone and anything.
I was a fugitive of the justice. A fugitive of the world, I didn't even know who I was.

I didn't have time to think because I needed to find money, somewhere, and buy something to eat, I was starving.
I hadn't never been out of my house without anyone and I didn't know how to win money. And I arrived to the conclusion, that, the only way possible was stealing.

I waited till it was dark in the night, and I went to an alley, where there was a man, sat on the floor, sleeping, and I thought that I couldn't steal to a poor man, it wasn't in my blood , just that.

- hey, honey!

I turned around.

- do you want to have fun with this old guy?

All of my body was going to hit him and then, I took a deep breath, and I took my clothes out, making sure that he was pendant of me.

- you're gorgeous.

- yeah?

- God yes.

- now take out your clothes.

- yes, sir.

He started taking them of, and when I was going to puke, he left his jacket on the floor.

- now, turn around, looking at the wall

- why?

- I'm going to be sooo bad.

And he turned around, with a smile on his stupid face. And when he didn't look at me, I took his jacket and my clothes and I left that perv, staying there, nude and waiting for a person that had left.

I arrived three streets further, with a smile of victory, and I put my clothes and his jacket, I looked for any wallet, and I found one, with a DNI on it.
" George Carrington".In the photo he looked great, like a lucky man, but it will probably be an old DNI. In the wallet there were 50 dollars, enough for buying something to eat.

I was in my hiding house, I had finished to eat. I had bought in a shop outside the center, food, water and a map of the US.

So, while I was going to be there, I needed to plan some things. Avoid calling from cabines, they were dangerous to me. Avoid talking with people and showing so much my face. Avoid important buildings and streets, and importantly, don't beeing in a place more than two following days.

Next day, I went out of the building and I found a Stubucks' shake, a cookies and marshmellows one, with a note on it. I took the note and I put it on my jacket, without even reading it.
I start running, I was going to go out of there, got a bus and go somewhere else of the country.

In the afternoon, it started to rain so I thought that people were going to go to their houses so I couldn't be able to hide into crowd so I took a bus, to a little village, with only 100 people living there and once there I started walking, till I found a bench, near the highway, and I sat on it.

I touched my necklace, it was a little dragonfly that my mother brought me before dying, and with wich I always talked.

" mum, I swear I tried to be brave, tried to go on with all the things that are happening to me."

A tear fell over my cheak and then I broke inside.

"but I feel like if I was an empty body, walking for doing it, breathing for doing it and living for no reason"
" It's just that I feel nothing"

My tears mixted with the rain and I get cold, and I didn't mind, I was actually frozen inside.
I took Justin's note from the pocket of the man's jacket.

" Noisy, this is not a letter from a policeman, is from a boyfriend, from a friend, and it's for saying that you're wrong if you think you're only job, you were job, won't say no, but in less of a week you turned into my entire world and this morning I thought that you had left me forever, but the truth is that you have ALWAYS brought me with you, always. Please, come back home"

I picked the note, and I left it in the middle of the ground, getting wet for the rain, letting that the water removes the ink of the paper, of that hurting words.

And I stood up and left, afraid of losing my feelings to everybody, even to myself.