I Can Only Dream (TomTord)

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A//N

This one shot isn't a request, I'll get back to them after this.

I've actually dreamt of this the other night.....most of it. The ending isn't the same.

I was supposed to post this earlier in the week but I was busy with life.

Plus my dog is in labor at the moment, so I'll be tending to my fur baby after this is posted.

🐕🐾🐶💕❤️

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Toms Pov

(in college)

For some reason, the boys and I went to the schools football game. We're not really into sports, but I guess we wanted to just do something different with our night besides watch Tv in our dirty dorm room.

Before I left, I was a bit drunk....maybe because I'm nervous since...

Edd and Matt are on a date, so they wish to be alone. Not in the mean way, it's just they don't want friends to be literally in between their love or some shit.

Sooo that leaves me with Tord. I kinda like him. Being a college student who drinks because of stress isn't the best for my mental health. So I'm a little mixed up. Confused with what I want out of life. I'm trying the gay thing out.

Tord and I sat in the the back bleacher, real high up. Not many people sat back there since everybody wants to see up close.

I held the popcorn I bought from the food stand, and he had some bonbons. French chocolate balls!! They're actually really good.

"Hm?" He held out a bonbon for me to take. I blushed and got real excited when he gave it to me. Taking small bites to savor the delicious treat. Tord smile back, pleased that I enjoyed it.

The game is just starting, but I can tell Tord isn't paying much attention to it. Just playing with his bonbon rappers. I'm not really interested in the game either. I was just tossing some popcorn into my mouth one by one.

Like I said, I drank before I came here so I'm a bit drunk. Plus, I'm really bored, so I'm probably going to fuck something up.

I noticed Tords hand beside my seat. Being completly stupid, I put my hand on top of his, blushing, looking away.

Tord must have noticed my feelings, since he turn my chin towards him and kissed me. His lips are soft and gentle against mine, as if my lips are fragile, and were about to break. I was still in shock, but then I finally delve into the kiss, going at a much faster speed then before. Making out. Tord didn't disagree since he kept going.

Does he....actually like me? Or....could it be because he's that bored and a prick.

I'm hoping for the best. Since, I would consider my feelings towards him serious.
I would hate to feel heart broken over him.

Later that night, we fucked. Because we got smashed and lost our minds together.

It was truly beautiful. I never felt so alive since forever. And happy!

Alcohol helped before, but drinking with someone is so much better! We're dating now too. Even after he woke up the next morning, he remembered what happened. And told me himself he had no regrets.

About a week later, we went to some Frat party. It was nuts. Tord and I are crazy people so we thought is was the perfect place for us.

In the first 30 minutes of arriving there, I lost Tord. Maybe off to get some punch or something. Or food. It seems like a thing he'll do.

The house is filled with jocks and babes. None of which interested me since they're all not my type at all, aaaand I have a partner who I'm deeply in love with.

I wanted to save the drinks until I meet up with Tord again, but I still don't see him. So I decided to look around the house for my boyfriend.

Walking upstairs, I see a few couples making out in the hallways, some others just talking. But I can hear a lot of moans....this must were the fucks happen. Walking past a certain door, a familiar accent sparked my attention. I decided to listen closer to hear who it is. And no, I'm not a creep.....just curious.

Listening in....it's....Tord! What the fuck is he doing?!?
I have no idea what to say or do, I feel like I'm in a panic.

Without thinking, I burst open the door in pure anger. "What the fuck!!" I screamed, but then firy tears ran down my cheeks. Very frustrated and confused.

They all looked up at me. He was in a three some!! Without my permission!! Tords expression most of all looked scared for what's about to come. (They were mostly clothed, btw. Unzipped pants, etc)

"I..I!-" He tried to explain, but I couldn't look for any longer. I stormed down the stairs, and out of the house, ready to have a break down.

Cold Smirnoff ran down my throat. It burned my chest at how strong the alcohol is. Looking out at the full moon through my window. Just thinking about how unlucky I've been throughout all my life...

I heard the front door open and close from behind me. Knowing who it was, I took another swig, pretending I didn’t hear the prick enter my apartment.

He took a breath, about to say something, but didn’t. How can he apologize for what he did?? What can he possibly say that would make me forgive and forget??

“..T-tom…-”

“A THREESOME?!?! NOT EVEN A WEEK WENT BY WITH Us, NOW A THREESOME????”

“I apologize for my horniness, babe, but it’s a frat party. That’s what happens there.”

“YOU SHOULD HAVE ASKED ME. I’M YOUR BOYFRIEND!!!”

“YOU WOULD HAVE SAID NO.” He began to raise his voice along with me

NO SHIT! YOU DON’T FUCK OTHER PEOPLE UNDER MY NOSE!!”

“WELL EVERY TIME I TRIED TO FUCK YOU, YOU TURN AWAY!! I WENT THROUGH WITH MY TEMPTATION AT THAT FRAT PARTY BECAUSE OF YOU-”

SHUT IT!!!” I screamed so he would stop…..”....Tord….do you even care about our relationship??..” I spoke in a softer tone

“...I do…-”

“That’s all I ever wanted, Tord. To truly love someone. Since….all of my life has been shit!...”

“...” He said nothing, at a loss of words

“My dad was shot in front of me.....my alcohol addiction.........my severe depression.” I took of few more gulps of the smirnoff, clearing my throat. “And now you…” He looked, ashamed. “I loved you so much, hoping that our relationship can distract me from my pain...but...you only proved that nothing is meant for me.”

I got up, not making eye-contact, towards the bathroom. “I can only dream of a decent life….not this…” I closed the door behind me and locked it.

After I got the meds out, he must of heard the pills shake in the small bottle, because he’s banging on the door.

“TOM! PLEASE, DON'T GO!”

*bang bang bang bang*

*gulp-**

“I'M SORRY!!...........let me go with you…”


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