Case of Vanishing Clothes

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Oh my god my wardrobe is completely empty. The only clothes I have left are the ones I am wearing and the dress I just bought. I have been left with only the clothes on my back literally.

For a minute I think I have been robbed but who would be desperate enough to steal my clothes when my small collection of precious jewellery bag is still there in full view. I look at my underwear drawer next. Wonder of wonders all my practical underwear have gone missing.

I know who the culprit is now. Who else but Sam will be responsible for going through my underwear drawers and vanishing my practical underwear. My detective work done it is time to round up the suspect.

The biggest challenge I am facing is not getting him to confess his crime but to make him admit that he is wrong in the first place.

He can be a like slippery eel. I have to make sure not to give into any of his distraction tactics and let him wriggle out of his latest transgression.

I have to hurry and catch him before he goes to work. Its already late as I went to pick the dress I had ordered from the shop. The dress if anything is even more beautiful than the one I saw. I took my time to try it on in the shop. The shop owner made sure that it fits me perfectly. It will be hard to wear any ready made clothes after this.

I am greeted by Luke in Sam's room. Sam is getting ready for work. He wants to leave as soon as possible. Is he avoiding eye contact with me?

"Sam wait a minutes. What did you do with my clothes?"

"Alice I am already late. Can we talk about this later. Besides didn't you get some new dresses today?"

"New dresses? I only got one dress."

"Are you going to get the rest of them later?"

"Rest of them? What do you mean? I am getting only one dress"

"You only bought one? But I specifically instructed the personal shopper to get you more."

"Yes I know and I overrode that request and got only one."

"Then you will have to get some more. I threw all your clothes in the rubbish. Now I got to go."

"Don't you dare put foot out of the room like that."

"Luke is there. Do you want to start a fight in front of him."

"Don't use Luke's presence as an excuse. I want my clothes and I want them now."

"They are already in the dumpster. They will be going to the tip soon."

"You better take them out of the dumpster before that happens. If I don't get all my clothes back then I swear to god I will drag you to the shopping with me and make you visit every shop in the mall and try all the dresses while you are waiting."

As threats go this is very effective.

"Ok what do you want me to do?"

"You have to search through the dumpster and get my clothes back."

"Women they can be the most unreasonable creatures in the world. What can you do? Can't live with them can't live without them."

"I heard that."

"For such a tiny woman you are already leading me through the nose. Come to the beach. Come to the school for the parent teacher interview. I agree to all your reasonable demands but this is completely insane. Why can't you buy more clothes for yourself when I am ready to pay the bill?"

"I cannot accept any money from you. We already discussed this."

"What if I can't find them?"

"Then I better come with you to make sure you look for them properly."

"Call Alice to come over earlier and we will look for your clothes"

We are at the dumpster. Sam is wearing a overall and thick industrial gloves to protect himself. The dumpster is so big that he has to stand inside to look through its contents. He is taking out all the waste that gets accumulated in a place like this. The smell is so overpowering that even standing on the side I am almost gagging.

He takes out leftover food, broken beer bottles, bag full of used condoms, used syringes even a dead cat. He keeps on taking out more and more unmentionable things.

Finally he takes out a bundle which could be my missing clothes. All I can see is that they are some items of clothing everything else is completely unrecognisable. If they are my clothes then they are sadly beyond repair. You see a normal person puts things in a bag before throwing it in the rubbish bin but Sam is anything but normal.

"Are they your clothes?"

"They could be but I am not sure. This looks like the pattern of my dress"

"Hey are you crying?"

"No something went into my eye."

"Look since I am responsible for throwing your clothes I will pay the penalty and buy you new dresses."

"This is the dress I was wearing when we first met."

"I apologise for throwing your clothes. Can you please stop crying?"

"I am sorry. I know you hate blubbering females."

"It's not that. I can't even give you hug. I am all covered in filth. Will you accept money to buy the dresses now?"

"No don't worry. I will think of something."

"God damn it Alice. You are too stubborn for your own good. Tell me would you accept money from me if we were married."

"Yes but we are not married are we?"

"Hum it's a thought. Ok I got to go."

He is going away. I am stunned by what he just said. It takes me about a minute to recover. I run after him.

"Sam you better explain what you just said to me! Sam!"

He walks away without a backward glance and enters the strip club. I am blocked by the bouncer at the door. Trying to go through this human barricade is useless.

I am left outside. I am standing near the dumpster with all it's refuge strewn about me and I am talking to myself like a crazy woman.

'How can I marry you. I don't even know your birthdate or your real surname for that matter.'

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