unsaid || p. parker

87 6 11

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Title: Unsaid

or

Talk Me Down*

Faceclaim: Timothée Chalamet*

OC Name: Nikolai Petrov

Setting: Pre-Avengers 1 (then timeskip unless you want to write out everything), Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, and then Pre-Civil War and Pre-Spider-Man: Homecoming

Epigraph:

"You don't have to say 'I love you' to say I love you"

or

"So come over now and talk me down"

Summary:

Nikolai Petrov never had a "good" life.  He has a had a decent family, though there were always secrets.  His house wasn't the worst; it was small for the family of eight but it was enough. The worst thing about the house was it's location.

There was a fence and on one side of that fence was the base for a group of ruthless criminals that governments of the world had been trying to dismantle for ages and on the other side of the fence was Nikolai's house.

But that was years ago.  Now the fence, and what was on both sides of it, is gone.

Nikolai remembers the day it happened, the day a bomb dropped right on his house.  It had been meant for the other side of the fence but there was a mistake, somehow.  The whole town got destroyed, not many making it out alive.

Nikolai was "one of the lucky ones."  He got saved by the one and only Clint Barton and taken to the U.S.

There, Nik met Nick Fury.  Fury saw something in him that could be useful.  Nikolai can't feel pain, not physically and had an emotional disconnect.  The psychologist Fury sent Nikolai to for evaluation summed the emotional numbness up to childhood trauma, the brain's way of protecting itself.  There was never an explanation for the total numbness to physical pain.

So, Fury, and S.H.I.E.L.D., decided that Nikolai could be useful.  Emotion and physical disconnect makes for a good spy and agent overall.  He just has to be taught to fake some emotions to get by as a spy and some training for fighting.  Fury assigns Natasha Romanoff to the task of training Nik, keeping the whole endeavor secret from most.

It's not long before Nik is being sent out on missions, already having some pre-S.H.I.E.L.D. skills that Fury makes clear shouldn't be questioned.

When the Avengers form, Nik starts training with them, of the few able to land a solid punch on Steve Rogers.

Slowly, Nikolai starts building emotional connections to the team, finding a family in them.  All that falls apart after Natasha releases all the S.H.I.E.L.D. and HYDRA files.

Nikolai finds out that the team has been lying to him.  That bomb that Clint was the first to tell him he didn't know where it came from, everyone else having told him the same?  It was from S.H.I.E.L.D., courtesy of Stark Industries.

Nik leaves after that, shutting down emotionally once again.  What the psychologist had told him was his mind's way of protecting itself feels like it's destroying him.

Desperate to feel something, anything, Nik ends up on the edge of one of the tallest buildings he could find, with a nice view of Avengers Tower so he can say goodbye before going.

Nik is interrupted by the up-and-coming hero of Queens, Spider-Man.

It takes a lot but the young hero manages to talk Nik down.

For the first time, Peter reveals his identity, knowing he can't leave Nik alone like this.  So, he takes Nik home, telling Aunt May that he's just a friend from school.  Aunt May spots the lie easily but allows Nikolai to stay, not wanting to send the young boy out on his own.

Things are all well and good until Tony Stark comes around and brings Peter in on Civil War.

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Notes:

↪Someone take this plot please and come to me with all the questions because I have so many ideas but don't have time to write it myself.

↪When Tony shows up, Nik leaves and maybe goes back to Russia to hide out.

↪After that, I have more ideas but can talk it out with whoever takes the plot.

↪Nikolai does not fall for Peter immediately and still has some days where he shuts down emotionally. He's on track to fully healing when Tony shows up and then Nik shuts down again.

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