10: Live With It

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This chapter contains some adult themes, the main one being that we dont always know what we want. We make mistakes, and we learn from them. I do not condone the behaviour in this chapter, it's simply a small part of Eve's journey.

Thank you for reading.

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The kiss was gentle, it always started that way. My muddled worries melted away for a second as I felt his lips part mine.

This is one of my last nights here, I realized. I was so unsure of what I was feeling. I wanted to take it further, enjoy the moment... but-

He broke my thought process, greedily pulling me back to him. I was fully in his lap now, feeling his lean frame under the shirt and soaking in the feeling of being wanted for as long as it would last.

The kiss heated a bit at the contact. His fingers were knotted in my hair, controlling me a little more than I liked. I tried to pull back and he leaned forward with me. His free hand pushed off the ground, turning and bringing me down to the cold grass.

"Stop overthinking babe." He was hovering over me now, undressing me with his eyes and assaulting my neck with his lips. His tongue swiped a sensitive spot, and I felt a wave of confidence pulse through me.

Grabbing his hips, I pulled his body to mine. It felt good.

He smirked into our kiss as I ran my fingers across his back, causing goosebumps to rise up where the cold air trailed behind. I knew I was having an effect, because he pushed his hips into my center. Though we were both fully clothed, I could feel him. It was the first time I'd let him go this far. I tried to bury my insecurities, but he was moving over me, tugging on my legs, wrapping them around him so he could feel me the same way. It brought a gentle moan to my lips. He looked down at me, blonde hair falling into his face as he smiled slowly.

"Jesus Christ, I've never seen you so... keen." Lust dripped from every word, and before I could stop him, he had kicked his jeans down to his knees. I didn't even seen him undo his zipper. My body tensed as this became all too real. His mouth had traveled downward, pulling my shirt and bra lower.

"Dawson." I whispered

"Mm." He groaned, palming my bra. He was so close. His mouth quickly covered mine, hoping to silence me, as his hips ground deeply into mine. My breath literally hitched at the feeling. My body was reacting with passion while my mind screamed at me to get out while I could.

"You are so ready for me." He assured between kisses. I pulled my face away, angry at my mind for ruining this and at my body for betraying me. Not taking the hint, he was kissing my chest again. A scream began building in my throat. I couldn't stop him. My brain froze as my body responded to his warm mouth on my naked breast.

"Oh my god." I voiced loudly.

"Fuck me, I want you Eve." He misinterpreted my panic for lust, and pressed two fingers against me through my jeans. The pleasure coursed through me in one swift wave. I couldn't help it.

"Dawson, wait." I was shivering now, "I'm not ready." He pressed the same spot again, lifting me off the ground as I arched toward him.

"Try telling your fit body that." He responded, knowing he had me in a state.

"I can't, I've never..." My fight or flight instinct was pushing me to react, so why couldn't I?

I'd asked for all of it, that's why.

"Don't fight it, doll. You want this almost as much as I do." His left arm supported my lower back, lifting and lowering me as his right hand brushed against my cotton panties. "I doubt you've ever been touched like this before." I grabbed handfuls of grass and fought the pleasure he was inflicting.

"STOP, Dawson please!" I kicked him away and he finally stopped his assault on me. I scrambled into a sitting position, pulling my jeans up as much as I could. Dawson glared at me as I left arms reach.

"Now, common, don't be selfish. Look at what you've done to me over here." I couldn't believe I was seeing him like this, hard and panting, needing me.

"Dawson, I'm sorry I just... need a minute." I didn't know why I was apologizing, but it seemed to bring him back to reality.

"Fuckin chicks." He mumbled, throwing his hands up. I hated myself right then. He was angry and I was still trying to come to grips with what had just happened. "You know, I really don't want to waste my time. You were begging for me a minute ago, get me thinking you've actually grown up but instead I'm getting shafted. And not literally either." He pushed his hand through his hair in frustration.

I finished pulling all my clothes back into place. He wasn't wrong, but he wasn't right either. I was still trying to be okay with the feelings he had just forced out of me, and I wished I'd been clearer with him... less willing for the distraction. It had sent the entirely wrong message.

"Maybe if you had listened to what I wa saying. I told you I wasn't ready, I told you!" My voice escalated to a yell, I was now standing as he rolled his eyes and stood up too.

"You make it seem so dramatic. Whatever happened to actions speak louder than words? Those actions were begging me to touch you," his anger evaporated as he stepped closer, pushing my hair away from my hair. "I've never seen someone who needed to get off so bad. Common babe, let me do that for you." He was whispering in my ear, manipulating me with each word.

"That's enough." I shook off angry tears. "You saw what you wanted to see and looked no further. Now I have to live with it." I shoved him off me, half-walking, half-running down the hill away from him. He let out a furious roar and punched what sounded like the tree. I was gone before he could chase me down, and this time I wouldn't be coming back.

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