9.

512 21 3

 I wished he was dead. I wish that when I watched him fall, that he died on impact. That he froze and bled out in that canyon. Instead, here he was. " What did they do to you?" My voice shook.

He was so confused. I pushed my hair out of my face, pulling my necklace out from under my shirt, " Bucky, it's Marilyn. It's Lyn, your Lyn."

He furrowed his eyebrows, pulling a gun from his belt. I put my shield up as he fired at me. Tears were pouring out of my eyes, but I knew this wasn't my Bucky. This wasn't the boy who held me when we were little after nightmares of my father's death haunted me into sleep. This wasn't the boy who never forgot to get me flowers on my birthday. This wasn't the boy who I loved so dearly.

I screamed as I threw my shield at him, cursing the world with every word I knew. What kind of cruel world would make me have to fight for my life against the one man I've ever loved? I caught my shield after it hit his chest, causing him to fly back. He was taken aback by the rage the fueled me right now. He swung, hitting me in the mouth. My teeth cut through my lip, but I spit the blood back into his face. He kicked my stomach, and I fell back into Steve, who had barely gotten off the ground. 

" Enough!"

There were suddenly agents surrounding us, every gun trained on us. Steve had my arms locked so I didn't do anything dumb. He looked as angry as I did, his eyes glistening. I glared at Rumlow, his face bruising from where I hit him, " I'm going to kill you." I said, breathing heavily, " I swear to god, you murdering, Nazi piece of shit, I'll kill you! I'll kill every one of you!"

" Shut her up." Rumlow gestured at me, looking at Bucky.

Bucky stood there, like he was internally crashing and burning. He picked a pistol up off the ground, stalking towards me as at least 15 men restrained Steve. " Stop it!" He yelled, " Don't touch her! Bucky, it's us! It's Marilyn and Steve! Stop it!"

I stood up, staring him in the face. He held the gun to my head, so I walked right into it. " Go ahead."

 I knew he was going to pull the trigger, so I grabbed his wrist with my right hand, twisting it. He grunted, elbowing me in the head, throwing me into the ground. I wished as my vision went dark, that someone would actually kill me. Anyone but him.

***

I woke up to a loud crash, and an impact. Someone lifted me from the ground, and began running. I opened my eyes, and brother was holding me. His face was scratched up, his hair stuck to his head with sweat. " What happened?" I groaned.

" They took us into custody. Maria Hill broke us out, but the truck crashed. We're going to the rendevous. Are you okay? Sam caught out when we crashed."

" Sam?" I was confused for a second, " Oh god, Sam and Nat. Where are they? Are they okay?"

" They're right behind us. They're okay. Nat was shot. Everyone is safe, well, safe as we can be."

" Let me down."

He set me on my feet, but still holding my hand to steady me as we ran. " Steve, silver minivan on Cherry Street!" Maria yelled from behind us.

I swung that door open, and basically collapsed into Steve when we sat down. I couldn't cry. I tried to make myself but I couldn't. Steve just tried to shush me, comforting me the best he could. " He'll be okay." He said.

" What did they do to him?" I whispered, " Steve, why? Why isn't he dead?"

" I don't know. I'm so sorry."

His voice was so full of pain. That was my boy, but it was his brother. His best friend. The only constant in his life besides me. Steve just watched the only other person in world he loved try and kill him and his little sister. The car began driving. I looked up, seeing Sam and Nat, looking worse for wear, and Maria behind the wheel, absolutely unreadable.

" Are you okay?" Sam asked.

I shook my head. He sighed, " Natasha told me about him. I'm sorry, Marilyn."

" You know what we have to do?" Natasha said, looking incredibly unhappy as she spoke.

I nodded, " We have to kill him."

***

It seems the world hates me, as whenever something bad happens, dreams of a better past plague me.

" My beautiful Lyn."

It was near the middle of the war. The Commandos were waiting on intel, so every night, Bucky was sneak to where I slept. The barracks apparently weren't good enough for Steve and I, even though we had assigned beds.

" You're sinning, James." I teased him, " Sleeping in a bed with a woman you aren't married to. Despicable, truly."

" I'm so sorry, Ms. Rodgers." He smiled, " I can't help myself."

" Did you ever think while you were flirting it up with the whole East Coast, you'd end up here?"

" Absolutely. Don't worry. When we get back and I have enough money, I'll get a diamond ring bigger than the Empire State building. Then we won't be breaking any moral laws."

" We've already broken too many."

" I'll see you in hell, then." He grinned.

I wanted to say the words. To tell him how violently I loved him. But not here. I wouldn't say it here. Not when we had absolutely everything to lose. " We're gonna get home," he said quietly, " I promise. We're going home. And we're gonna be so happy. Everything will be normal again."

" Not with Steve and I like this." I gestured to my arms, " We're unnatural. The army is gonna want us forever. To do things for them. Stark said that... Steve and I don't age like you do. I'm gonna be younger for a lot longer. They'll want us forever."

" Well. If they want you so badly, I'll just have to go along with you. I know they made a new serum. They'll have to make me like you if they wanna take you from me ever again."

" Bucky, I don't want you like me." I said, " It's nice, not getting sick, and healing quicker, but I'm like this forever. It put a huge target on me and Steve. It ruined my body. My hormones are everywhere, things hurt so much worse... I-I can't have kids anymore. You don't want that. That's probably a deal breaker for you."

I recently learned about the kids thing. Its the hormone imbalances that Stark is still trying to fix for me. Steve is likey just fine, but it'll be harder for him. I'm shut down in the baby making area. Permanently. Stark can't fix that.

" You still tend to think I'm like all the other schmucks. I'm no modern piece of shit. Steve and I never were. So what? You're emotional and can't have kids. I'm still going to follow you and be right by your side. No matter what. We've come too far for me to just leave you alone. Til the end of the line, remember?"

I nodded, " Til the end of the line."

WinterWhere stories live. Discover now