It was already 3:30. Tré still wasn't home. I had been practicing guitar in our basement for the last hour trying to distract myself. I don't know why I always get so paranoid when Tré leaves, but I find that if I'm not distracted, I just sit around worrying about him. I put down my guitar and head up the stairs to get a beer. As I walk into our kitchen, I can see the blinking light on our answering machine. I hit it and listen, while getting a beer from the fridge.
"You have one unheard message. First message."
"Hey Frank, it's Claudia."
The beer can slips out of my hand, as that familiar voice fills the room.
"Thanks for today. It was really special. Don't worry, I won't tell Billie. Give me a call if you need my assistance again. Bye!"
"End of message. Sent today at 3:25 pm"
My feet were wet from the beer I had spilt, but I hadn't noticed. I kept staring blankly at the wall. I could hear her voice screaming through my ears, "Don't worry, I won't tell Billie."
I tried to rationalized what I had heard, but the only thing I could focus on was the constricting of my rib cage, and the fast drum-like beat of my heart conducting this frantic march. I could feel my hands starting to go numb, so I ran for the bathroom. I had started hyperventilating and feeling faint. I dropped to the floor of the bathroom and ripped the bathmat off of the ground. I struggled to find the loose floor tile, concealing the box-cutter I had stolen from Tré's tool kit. I tried to steady my right hand enough to grasp the blade and aligned it with my left arm. My hand was shaking wickedly, as my breathing increased. I could feel the oxygen being cut off from my brain. The thin layer of skin concealing my veins, looked so inviting to me. It was as if it was just screaming to feel the cool breeze coming from the window.
"Billie! I'm home!"
I gasped. In shock, I dropped the box cutter. Quickly I scrambled to place it back in its spot and cover it with the bath mat and tile. I tried to steady my breathing with each of Tré's footsteps. I turned and saw Tré standing in the doorway. He walked towards me and dropped to his knees. Taking my trembling hands he said, "Deep breath in, come on. Remember your breathing exercises?" I followed him through each exercise.
When my breathing had steadied he pulled me into his chest and held me.
"It's ok to panic. I'm here."
No! I pushed him away from me and stumbled on to the floor.
"I know you were with Claudia! She called here! I know you fucked!"
Tré's face confused me. He didn't look guilty or ashamed, as I'd anticipated. He just looked confused.
"Bill... yeah I was with her, but we didn't fuck. God I'd never... Why would you even say that to me?"
I could feel a white hot fury overwhelm me as I screamed, "Because her voicemail said, 'Don't worry, I wont tell Billie!' "
To my astonishment Tré looked surprisingly calm. He actually started laughing! I got up to leave when Tré grabbed my arm.
"No pretty boy, come back. Nothing happened. She was helping me with my... uh... errands. Look, I have a bit of a surprise for you tomorrow night and I needed her help. That's why she said that."
I stared at Tré. I wanted to believe him, I did. Then again he cheated on Claudia with me, why wouldn't he do it again? Tré must've read my face because he said, "Billie Joe, I love you. I promise tomorrow, night I'll explain everything. Can you please just trust me for tonight?"
I sighed, "Ok."
Tré kissed my forehead and left to go make us dinner. I still wasn't convinced. I needed to hear from someone else. I walked up to our bedroom and phoned Mike's house. To my disappointment, Mike wasn't the one that picked up.
"Oh, hey Christine. Is Mike there?" I asked.
"Aw, you just missed him. He's picking up Chinese food."
"Wait a sec, Billie are you around tomorrow?" She asked.
"Adrienne and I are going to the beach and a bunch of clubs! You should totally come with us!"
"No offense, Christine, but why the fuck would I want to spend the day with my bitchy ex wife?"
"Well, your 'bitchy ex wife,' is my best friend. Once Mike and I are married, you'll probably be seeing her a lot." She informed me.
"Gee, I'm overcome with excitement." I mumbled
"Oh come on Billie Joe, live a little! Get away from your ball and chain for the day. Besides, I want to get to know you better."
I considered her offer. If Tré wanted fuck around with his ex, I may as well. The only issue is I fucking hated being around Adrienne.
"Would Mike be there?" I wondered.
"Nope. Just a day for the wives. Come on, don't you want to run around all day with half naked women?" She teased.
Not really. Kinda the point of my boyfriend. Like, I could literally feel my legs closing, as she spoke. Of course, it would drive Tré nuts...
"Alright, I'll come."
"Cool. Pick us up at noon." She squealed
I hung up the phone and went to eat the meal Tré had prepared. I didn't offer him anything to talk about. It occurred to me, that spending an afternoon with Adrienne and Christine, may not be worth the mile irritation it would give Tré.
YOU ARE READING
How Long Is Forever?Romance
In the darkest moment of his life, Billie must decide if he wants to continue living. I don't want to give away anything more then that! Buckle up for a very dramatic trillie fanfic!