I stand up from his lap. I can't think clearly when I'm this close to him and when every breath I take is filled with his infamous smell.
"I don't ... I don't know, Adrian. I'm too confused right now, I just don't know what to think." My mind is too full. My brain is overthinking and finding reasons why he showed up here. It's like I can't believe him, although my gut is saying he's telling the truth. I'm just so scared to trust him.
Adrian puts his elbows on his knees, leaning forward. He looks so hopeful and so desperate, his face is raw with emotions. He has never shown that many emotions in such a short period of time. His face is usually hard to read, but not tonight. I know he's trying to hide his feelings, but he's failing.
"I'm prepared to beg you if I have to, Cassandra," he says hoarsely.
My eyes widen. I can't imagine him ever doing that – for anyone. He's a man with pride. "Don't," I say before anything crazy comes to his mind. It's not my intention for him to humiliate himself. That won't help my wandering thoughts and overthinking mind. "That won't help or change anything. I just want some time to think about this, Adrian. I don't want to jump into something I'll regret later. You really hurt me with your actions. I need to learn to start putting myself first and know what's good for me." What I don't say is that I hope he's good for me.
"And if you'll convince yourself I'm not good for you, I won't stand a chance with you," he says what I don't. "Gotcha." He stands up, looking miserable as ever. He takes his suit jacket and I panic a little because he looks like he's leaving. But, I remind myself, that is for the best. "How about breakfast tomorrow?"
"That's not enough time for me to think –"
I sigh in exasperation. "Adrian," is all I say. This man really is something else. "A week. At least."
He doesn't like that. His eyes darken. "Dinner, then. Tomorrow. I'll come to pick you up."
"No," I object, but Adrian is already walking towards the door. I turn around and gape at him. He throws the suit jacket over his shoulder, looking like he came straight from some magazine cover. A million dollar sight, that's what he is.
He turns at the door. "I think you still have my number." I see he left the phone I left behind at his house - my phone - on my table.
"Yes, but –"
"Good. Be ready at 8 tomorrow." He gives me a wink and before I know it, he's gone, leaving me staring incredulously at the closed door.
I sit down on the chair like an empty bag. "What in the God's name just happened?"
I can't go tonight.
It takes me a long time to find the courage and send Adrian this text. I don't know why I'm so afraid of even texting him. I know I'm scared shitless to see him again tonight.
YOU ARE READING
ʻʻWhat's forbidden is always the sweetest.ʼʼ This is a story where you're going to hate him. You might even hate her. The two people who are doing something very wrong in other people's eyes, but to them it's the most right thing they've ever done...