Teardrops of Roses [Completed]

Prologue -

____________~❤~s2~❤~____________

                                                     Author's Note.
                                                      -22 May 2018.-

Truthfully, I'm not sure how to really continue this story.

I started it in 2010 when I was 15 and naive. As the years went by, I have come to really be almost burdened by it. I realized the whole central backbone of the story: themes of rape, and dealing with the issue of rape, is definitely not something to be taken lightly or even romanticized. That is largely why I keep pausing the book, then coming back and then always trying to change certain aspects of the story so that it the implications isn't so twisted in nature (i.e. the idea of falling in love with a rapist).

The reason I am having so much turmoil is because I absolutely do not condone this sort of idea at all and quite frankly do not want to continue writing this story if that's the outcome. I think I set myself a huge bottomless pit all those years ago beginning this project when I didn't even have a solid story at all.

I know that I have some fans who have been here for years hoping that I will continue the story, and for that I would like to really thank you and I have decided to finish it!

I wrote a paragraph many years ago asking readers for their opinions on how the story should turn out and I received a bunch of ideas, but mainly people asking me to update lol. Thank you again if you gave your input, I appreciate your time. (I wrote a few more things in a note within the book).

P.S . I saw a few comments regard what ~S2~mean, it's just another way to write a love heart with the keyboard.

P.S.S I have now completed the story. I hope you enjoy as much as it has given me so much joy to write. 

  ___~❤~s2~❤~__

                                               P R O L O G U E . 

Violated and filthy.
I still feel that way sometimes even if it has been so long since it happened. 

It's hard a hard feeling to shake when it feels like your life was based around 'it' and 'what happened' for many years. It's like this unfortunate 'thing' had to happen and it changes your whole life and you entirely, and now all you know is 'it' and nothing of what life was before. 
But I'll get better, I'm working on it.

-

Three years ago my best friends at that time and I were lucky enough to have been invited to a graduation party hosted by the seniors. Being one of the only handful of eighth graders amongst a sea of older students, I really thought we made it into the 'It' crowd. And it was honestly all I wanted back then. Long bleached blonde hair, the shiniest lipgloss on my lips, pink painted nails with hearts. Oh, and boys.

We were just turning fourteen. And it was cool — hanging out with the older kids.
We were cool, we thought.

Alcohol was being circulated around with no end in sight and within five minutes of getting there, everybody had either a cold bottle or cup in their hands including us.

We were trying to impress our older peers by taking shots of Jack Daniels mixed in with Coca-Cola. It was our first time actually drinking something substantial, but no one else had to know, so we kept it that way.

Smiling, giggling and nodding our heads to whatever the seniors said to us, we were trying to show that whatever we were doing wasn't a big deal. As if we drank every second weekend as a sport – you know, casually, like every fourteen year old does in their spare time.