Erotica Do's and Dont's

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Written By- ES Hurricane


Erotica can be very subjective as to people's tastes. There are so many different flavours just as there are different genres of stories! And everyone has their own interests, just like they have their own interests in sex. It's impossible to please everyone, but if you're true to your own interests, then your erotica will shine!

Do - Know your niche

As I said above, there are so many different flavours of erotica! The best way to figure out what your scenes are going to be about is to figure out your niche. Are you writing werewolf romance? Chances are the sex is going to be a predator/prey kind of dynamic, depending on who the wolf is, or if they're both wolves, then buckle in for a rough animalistic ride.

Is your story a contemporary romance? If it's a romance set in our world, what are your character's motivations? If it's a shy nerdy girl and a musician guy, then chances are they'll be having more vanilla sex than our werewolf friends.

The key here is to work within your world that you've built. If you've set up a boss/secretary master/slave kind of deal, then that's where you're off to!

Don't - Over describe movements

He reached out with his hands and took her shoulders. She kissed him on the lips and tilted her head to the side. He stepped forward.

BORING. Obviously, during a steamy scene you need to have some sort of blocking for your characters, but most of the time, less is more. Try going for the feel of the movements, or the emotions that come with it, as opposed to just listing the positioning of their bodies.

He took her shoulders as they kissed with abandon, hearts entwining in a heavenly dance as their tongues massaged one another.

Okay, that sentence could be tighter, but you get what I mean. There's more emotion in the second example, and that will put me more into what's happening than simple blocking of where everyone's body parts are.

Do - Write what you know

This is a given for most writing, but this is especially true for erotica. Most of the time it's very difficult to describe how something feels if you haven't experienced it yourself. However, if you have extremely open friends or are very good at doing research, it's possible to pull this off, but the more authentic, the better.

For some things, like paranormal romance, or alien erotica, obviously you can't experience it, but at least if you have some kind of ball park frame of reference it will make it a lot easier to describe how things are feeling.

Plus, what better reason to try something new? "Come on honey, it's for research for my book."

Don't - Skimp on dialogue

Dialogue is just as important in steamy scenes as the movements, don't be afraid to use it! A few well-placed growled lines from a brooding hero or moaned pleas from a heroine in the throes of orgasm can help bring a scene to the next level.

However, it's generally looked down upon to write out noises. It's usually better to write She moaned his name. instead of "Ohhhhhhhh Johnnnnn!" she moaned.

Do - Try something new

Remember back when I said 'Write what you know?' Well, that doesn't mean you can't push the envelope sometimes. There are so many overused tropes out there, and it's fun and refreshing to push the envelope by turning a trope on it's head or going with something completely different.

Sometimes doing this with some of your random background characters is a great way to claw your way out of writer's block, even if you're not going to publish the scene.

Don't - Write anything you're uncomfortable with

Sometimes a scene doesn't need to be a scene. If you want two characters to explore something that squicks you out, it'll show in your prose! Sometimes a fade to black is just fine too. Again, less is more!


There is no real right or wrong way to go about writing erotica scenes, only really as much as there is a right or wrong way to go about writing in general. One last piece of advice - read as much erotica as you possibly can. Get a feel for what you like, and what you're comfortable with. Prefer the fluffier romantic kind? Go for more feelings in the moment. More into the kinkier emotionally detached scenes? Then buckle down with some dirty vocabulary and get experimenting.

The main thing is, if you think it's hot, your readers will think it's hot. Stay steamy, my friends!

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