50. "We should." (Narration)

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A very long chapter ahead.

August 15, 2018
Hey Lisa Manoban,

It's been two months since you left, you must be surprised on why I am writing you this letter. Namjoon hyung told me letters are underrated these days eventhough it is the sincerest thing ever. Blame technology, he says. So yeah, I didn't bother communicating with you in these three months which by the way, is what I defined hell. I'm already training for two months, trainee life is tough, the trainers and coaches are strict, I can't even drink my banana milk without hiding, they are also so strict when it comes to my diet. If only you are here, but yeah, that's not gonna happen, right? Senior year is approaching and unlike before I'm not really looking forward for it because I'm not gonna spend it with you.

Are you just fine there? By the way, I'm studying English so that when my parents finally allowed me to go there, I can converse with you and the people there. I'm still salty about you leaving me here alone, but I understand you. I'm truly sorry if I acted like that before.

Trainee life is hard but when I think about how much you want me to reach this dream, I became motivated again.

Thank you so much, you're the best.

And also Lucas is already here, Namjoon hyung and Jin hyung let him stay at our dorm, they are all whipped for Lucas, even Yoongi hyung and of course, specially Taehyung hyung. Lucas adjusted well, you know him, he's not that hard to grew fond of.

Ps. Expect more of these letters from now on, I just want to update you with the happenings here in Seoul so that when you come back you'll not get left out and you'll adjust well.

Pps. I miss you so much, the wedding offer is still up and please don't look at any boys there.

You already have me.

Longing for you,
Your Kookoo


September 01, 2018
Hey Lis,

It's my day today but why didn't you even contact me? Did you forget about me already? I spent this day waiting for your message but nothing came that's why I just think that this day is just a normal one instead of being sad and moping around.

Everyone came, but you didn't. I want you to be here on my special day, I'm really stupid, I know. How are you doing there in Australia? Do you find new friends? Are they treating my Lili right?

I guess everyone loves you there as much as you are being loved here.

And oh, finally Jimin hyung asked Chaeyoung out. They are dating already, don't worry about Chaeyoung, she's safe with hyung.

I miss you so much, please come back.

Kookoo :)


December 26, 2018

I'm really really sorry if I haven't wrote you a letter yesterday, we were given a surprise evaluation in Bighit. I was so nervous, I literally run to the comfort room before it was my turn to pee lmao. Fortunately, the trainers loved my performance, I sang Lost Stars while thinking of you, that's so cheesy right?

By the way, belated Merry Christmas, the weather is too cold here, I want to feel warm again, can you please come back?

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