21: Family

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  "I lost my wife and my baby girl," Hoseok took a deep breath, "Denyi and I had only been married a few months, and Breea was only three months old,"

He lowered his head even more, and it was obvious that there were tears dripping from his eyes, "They were beautiful. The most beautiful girls I had ever seen. Breea looked like her mother, and she had a temper like her, too," He lifted a hand to wipe his eyes, "We were hiding out in an old house, and I left the room to get some more wood for a fire. Denyi was so tired and it was cold. I just wanted her to rest. Breea woke up and began to cry; Denyi hadn't been able to feed her for a few hours, because we were on the run and she was just so worn down. I didn't know there were dead ones locked in one of the rooms. We'd been quiet, and it must have only realised we were there when my baby began to cry,"

The silence in the room was tense and shocked, but they let him continue talking.

"I heard her crying, and I heard Denyi get up to comfort her. I heard her soothing voice. She was humming a lullaby. Then there was a bang, and a loud crash. Denyi was screaming and by the time I got up the stairs, it was too late. The dead one had her pinned. She was screaming and screaming and when she saw me, she yelled at me. She yelled at me to take Breea and leave,"

Hoseok lifted his hands to his face and let out a choked sob, "We didn't see the other dead one until it was too late. I tried to stop it, but it had already- it had already-"

"Hoseok," Bee spoke quietly, getting up from where she was sitting on her husband's lap and moving around the table towards him. She sat on the vacant seat next to him and wrapped her arms around his body. He leaned into her unconsciously, his body trembling as he tried to control his sobs, "Let it out," Her voice was gentle, "It's okay, you have to let it out,"

Yoongi got to his feet and gestured for the other people in the room to leave. He didn't think it was fair for them to spectate his anguish.

Once Hoseok had stopped crying, Bee wiped at his sore eyes with a cool, damp cloth.

"I think I understand you a lot more now, Hoseok," She said quietly, "I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine the pain,"

Hoseok took a deep, shuddering breath and reached into his pocket. He pulled out a little photograph, taken on a polaroid camera and placed it on the table.

"This is them," He said, "Denyi and Breea. It happened at the beginning of the breakout, so it's been a long time," He sighed, "I hadn't cried about it properly, I guess. I just kept the guilt and pain to myself,"

"It wasn't your fault," Bee said, "It was a horrific tragedy, but it wasn't caused by you,"

Hoseok took the cloth and rubbed his eyes, "There are lots of factors that play into this," He said, "I picked the house. I didn't check it properly. I left my wife and baby unattended while I-"

"You wanted to keep them safe," Bee said, "Keep them warm, provide shelter, food and some comfort. You were doing your best for your family. None of that was your fault,"

He shrugged, "Well, either way, it doesn't matter. They're gone,"

"But you're still here," Bee said gently, "And you will live for them, right? You'll make your beautiful wife and your beautiful baby proud of you. They wouldn't want you to keep holding onto any pain, or needless guilt,"

Hoseok smiled at her a little, "Yeah, I guess you're right,"

Bee smiled and stood up, "Of course I am. I'm a scientist. I'm a smarty pants,"

Hoseok laughed and nodded, "Yeah, you are. You should rest. You need it,"

"Hey, Hoseok," Bee said as they both left the kitchen, "Seeing as you have experience with the whole pregnancy and childbirth thing... If it's not too painful for you, would you help me out? I don't really know what I'm doing, to be honest,"

"Some smarty pants," Hoseok smiled, "But yes. I will help. Thank you,"

"We're all a family," Bee said, heading up the stairs, "We need to take care of each other. Goodnight, Hoseok,"

Hoseok thought back to Yoongi, and about how he said they all needed to get to know each other more, or the dynamics of the group wouldn't work. He thought that in some ways, Yoongi was right. He did feel a little closer to the rest of the people who were sat in the kitchen as he cried, but he realised that in some ways, Yoongi was wrong.

They were already a close group, willing to protect each other from anything that could go wrong. It was obvious when Bee had pointed a gun at Taehyung to protect them. It was obvious how Jungkook had stood up for Daisy when one of the newcomers had said that she was "only a cook".

He realised it by how much respect they already had for eachother, and the trust that they had all just shown by revealing painful memories, and how Bee was willing to trust him to help her with her pregnancy, even though he had argued that her having this baby was a bad idea.

He knew that they weren't just acquaintances, as Jimin had brought him and Jin along with them when they left the camp. Jimin was capable of driving and reading a map, yet he still brought along two unlikely allies who weren't even military.

With a sigh, he decided that instead of going to bed, he would go downstairs and see how Namjoon was doing. He knew that Jimin had probably gone down there while he and Bee were in the kitchen, but he decided that he needed to change his attitude.

They were a family, so he needed to make just a little more effort to make it known that he wasn't as cowardly or selfish as he seemed. 

He was just scared of losing everything again.

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