Larry Jotter and the Order of the Bean Mix
Lord Baldymort ran his hands over his scalp, revelling in the feel of the bare skin against his scaly hands. His tongue flicked from his lips as Wormscale approached, a serious expression on his ratlike face.
"I hope you like it my Lord" he said holding up the mirror behind him so that he Baldymort could see the back of his head in the larger mirror in front of him.
"You have done well Wormscale" he replied.
Baldymort applied a hot towel to his head; he loved a freshly shaved head in the morning.
Minutes later he sat in his tall highbacked chair with a cup of his favourite cocoa, his mood dark. Nothing had yet managed to penetrate the defences around Bogwarts. That old fraud Grumblemore had managed to thwart all his efforts at getting to the boy Jotter.
"We need a new idea. Wormscale come here." He ordered peremptorily "we must come up with an idea to get into Bogwarts. We must exploit a weakness; perhaps we can use one of his friends, the dudblood girl Hermoney or the Measley boy."
He sat in dark contemplation for several minutes and then his eyes glowed slightly in the shadows of the room. A smile teased his bloodless lips and he whispered quietly into his servant's ear....
..."you dump a blanket on his head and sit on him and I'll see if I can get the cork in 'kay?" whispered Larry.
His two roommates nodded at him and they glanced at Measley who was sitting on his bed stuffing his face as usual. The three of them ran swiftly across the room, only their feet showing underneath the invisibility cloak in the darkened room of the Whiffindor tower.
"Aargh" shouted Don as three teenage boys suddenly appeared from nowhere, stuffed a blanket over his head and ripped down his trousers. Larry, wand in hand muttered something under his breath and the cork flew into position prompting a muffled roar of anguish from Measley who desperately tried to get free from his captors.
"That'll sort you out" said Bean "we are fed up of you eating all this junk and gassing us out all the time."
Don suddenly went stiff under the blanket, all his muscles tensing.
"Oh hell" said Larry a split second before the cork shot out, bouncing off the lantern before taking out a window. The three boys staggered back, eyes tearing as noxious fumes filled the room.
"Expelliarmus" giggled Don uncontrollably, pulling off the blankets from his head. "That'll teach you, you bunch of gremlins."
Larry and the other two teens were lying on the floor twitching gently until Don pulled out his wand and dispersed the recent result of his addiction to nibbles.
"Thanks Don" said Larry getting to his feet. "You really need to stop eating that stuff, it's not good for our health."
"Or yours" muttered Shaymarse darkly as he looked out through the smashed window onto the lawns below.
The squabbling was broken up suddenly as an owl burst into the room, depositing something composed mainly of half digested mouse on Bean's head and a note in front of Don.
As Bean ran screaming in horror around the room, Larry approached his friend, cautious not to get too close in case of further eruptions.
"What is it Don?" asked Larry eager for something that might remove Don's overperforming innards from the vicinity.
"I've won!" he shouted gleefully "I sent in to the Wizardy Nibbles monthly competition to win a lifetime supply of their "Magic Mix" and it's at the main gate now."
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Larry Jotter and the Order of the Bean MixFanfiction
(Humour) A parody of a rather well known magician's school life. Will Baldymort triumph at last? Not if the rubber chicken has anything to do with it. Pull my finger... A Harry Potter parody FanFic