Yesterday, I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while taking a nasty shit. A woman from Seoul got into an argument with her husband. She became very drunk during the course of the conversation and demanded her keys to drive home. Her husband told her to take a taxi. She became so angry that she set herself on fire with gasoline. Luckily, she only suffered second degree burns on her face and body. Things could have been much worse. She's currently recovering in a local hospital.
I drove Rice-Boy Larry to school. He refused to wear his seatbelt. He's a sensitive boy, and he was upset because his mommy had forgotten to tell us goodbye. So I called The Dragon Lady on my smartphone. Larry's mood brightened, and he buckled up.
I attended a prayer meeting in Female Paul's classroom. Female Paul is one of the bible teachers at my school. She also functions as a pastor. She has a master's degree in divinity from a college in the States. But I don't believe that a woman is qualified to be a minister. The real Paul says so in his epistles. However, I'm not one to rock the boat, so I prefer to keep my mouth shut. I'm wonderful that way.
Female Paul tends to babble like a pagan. Her prayers take a million years to complete. I can often feel my asshole pucker in frustration as she goes on and on and on. Yet I like her a lot. The poor girl lacks confidence. That's why she never shuts the fuck up.
I bought Ken plane ticket. It cost me $1,600. He will arrive at Incheon on May 26th and return to Texas on July 31st.
I called him on Facetime.
He said, "What plane am I taking? I hope it's not American Airlines. I hate American Airlines."
I said, "It's American Airlines."
"That's OK. We'll probably go to Daejeon after I arrive."
"I don't think so. Mom's fighting with the Queen Elephant and Number One Sister-In-Law."
"We'll still have fun."
"I hope so. But your mom is a little nuts. I just hope that she doesn't throw us out."
I taught four classes. In the advanced class, we're reading A Good Man Is Hard to Find. We're halfway through the story. The kids laughed a lot, but they didn't enjoy the story too much. They think it's racist. I tried to explain that the grandmother is supposed to be an unsympathetic character who's eventually gifted grace from God. However, the kids weren't buying what I was selling. Oh well. What's a boy to do?
The Dragon Lady came to school. On Fridays, she eats lunch and gabs with the other mothers.
She said, "I not go home. I go Chan-ho mommy's house. What you eat for dinna?"
I said, "If you give me money, I can walk to Dang Dang Chicken."
"Arone? No way. I go McDonald. I bling you food."
True to her word, she delivered a Big Mac and French fries to the villa. I spent the evening alone. I viewed porno. One of my favorites is Ginger Havana. She's a three-hole Latina. I watched a compilation of her finest work. Then I jerked off. I had a great time. I went to bed at nine p.m.
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Filthy Beast: The Diary of an English Teacher in South KoreaHumor
This book is a modern day horror story. A man lives in hell with his crazy Korean wife. They own an apartment in the Republic of Korea located in the city of Busan. He works at a Christian school. This memoir documents the abuse he must endure at th...