Chapter 10

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Harry pov

Kate kissed me! Kate kissed me! That's what I keep thinking when I get out of my car. I lean against it, close my eyes and take a deep breath. It felt so good, her arms around my neck, her beautiful red lips on mine. It was a fast kiss. Kate realised what she was doing and pulled back immediately. The moment she kissed me, I realised how much I want her but I can't. I just can't.
I have to get her out of my head. I don't have any other choice.
I open the trunk of my car and take out the wheelchair. After I open it, I wheel it to the passenger's door and open it. I give Kate my hand and she gets out of the car in the wheelchair, "First lunch then the animals?" I suggest to Kate.
She gives me a big smile and nods enthusiastic, "Let's go".

I walk to the entrance and pay for our tickets. "Harry, let me play for the tickets please," Kate asks but I tell her I already took care of it. She groans but says nothing.
The weather is nice today, the sun is out and it's pretty warm. I push Kate's wheelchair to the zoo restaurant, not far from the entrance. I ask Kate if it's okay to sit outside and her face lights as she nods with a big smile. We sit down, or better I sit down next to where I have placed Kate in her wheelchair so we can both have a good look at our surroundings.

"I love the zoo, I haven't been here since before my first back surgery," Kate says while she takes a look at the menu. The waiter comes and we both order spaghetti bolognese and a water.
"How does it feel to go out when you know there will be more pain afterwards?" I have wanted to ask this since the first time but never found the courage because I know Kate doesn't like to talk about it.

"I have to choose what activity is worth the pain and who is worth the pain but I also take into account of how long the drive is, will I have to walk or can I use the wheelchair, can I easily sit or lay down when it's needed. It's all the little things when a person is healthy but for someone like me it's very important. People aren't always very understanding about these things," Kate explains.
"I'm happy you consider me worth the pain," I smile at Kate, knowing this warms my heart.
I stop talking for a moment when the waiter brings our drinks. We both thank him. The waiter winks at Kate and a bubble of jealousy explodes in my chest but I say nothing.

"But what do you mean, they aren't understanding?" I ask confused, isn't it normal you are understanding if your friend has health issues.
"First of all," Kate puts her hand on mine and looks up, "You are worth so much more than this pain". She talks very quietly now, almost like she is afraid to tell me this,
"and secondly, people aren't very understanding about all this. In the beginning, yes they are but soon they get tired of you cancelling arrangements because you're in too much pain. Your world gets smaller and smaller because you can't do the things you did before, so you don't have much to talk about except doctors, pain and pills. They get tired of that very quickly. So soon they stop calling."
My heart breaks for Kate and all the others who has to go through this. They already have to live with so much pain. They don't deserve people acting like that.
"I lost so many people since this first started. In the beginning, I was very sad about it but soon I realised these people weren't real friends and it's their loss. Nobody has ever done something nice and kind like you have today. You thought about me. You thought how we could go out with me being comfortable. It really touched my heart and I will never forget it," Kate gives me a little smile.
Her hand is still on mine but I take mine away, put it on hers and squeeze it a little.

Our little moment gets interrupted when the waiter brings our food. We both pull back our hands and start to eat. The rest of our lunch we talked about the zoo and what animals we definitely want to see. When we were done eating Kate insisted on paying because she wanted to thank me. I said it wasn't necessary but she really wanted it so I let her do it.

I started walking around the zoo watching the various animals. The delight was written on Kate's face. Seeing the fun she was having and that it was me who could give this to her made me proud but my heart fully burst when I heard her squeal when she saw the elephants.
"Harry, there are the elephants! Faster, faster please," she yelled. I started to run and Kate giggled like a teenage girl, it was adorable. When we finally reached the colossal animals she suddenly was very quiet and was watching them with big eyes and her mouth slightly opened. I, on the other hand, wasn't watching the elephants, I was watching Kate. There was nothing else what I wanted to do but hold her in my arms and kiss all the pain away. I wanted to tell her I would always take care of her and never let her go but I couldn't, and that feeling ripped my heart apart.
"Look, Harry, a little baby," Kate pulled me out of my thoughts. "Isn't she the cutest," she took my hand and looked up.

I smiled and gave her a nod, "Just like you, sunshine!" she giggles and squeezed my hand. After a while, we walked on to see the next animals but I saw how Kate got uncomfortable in her wheelchair. She was wiggling around, holding her back, touching her leg and I knew she wouldn't admit it but, it was time for her to go home. So I made my way to the exit and when she didn't complain I knew I did the right thing. I helped her into the car before putting the wheelchair into the trunk.

During the drive to her apartment Kate was still talking amazed about the elephants and told me it was her dream to sit on the back of an elephant but she knew it would never happen.
"Do you mind staying a little while I take a shower? It's been a long day and I am little scared that I might fall when nobody's around," she asked when we arrived at her place.

"Of course not, take your shower," I replied. While she was in the shower I decided to make myself useful and make her some sandwiches so she wouldn't have to do it later. This afternoon asked a lot of her and she will be in more pain later. I gather all the medicines she needs, take a bottle of water out of the fridge and walk over to her bedroom. I knock but she doesn't answer so, I walk in and put everything on her night stand. As I go to leave the room I see the bathroom door is cracked open a little bit. I look through the opening and see Kate through the glass shower wall. Her beautiful auburn hair is falling over her shoulders, her back with multiple scars only makes her more perfect, her full bum and her gorgeous long legs. She is all I've ever wanted. I tear my gaze away, sigh and walk back to the kitchen.
Some time later Kate walks into the kitchen wearing pink shorts and a top. She really is trying to kill me by showing off her perfect body, "I'm going to bed now. Do you want to stay?" she asks me.
I shake my head, "No sunshine, go to bed and rest. You can call me whenever you need me okay?" She smiles and and limps to me to pull me into a hug, "Thank you Harry,"she says quietly. I bury my face into her neck and sigh. I look into her eyes and I want to stay like this forever. I move my head closer and caress her nose with mine. It takes all my willpower not to kiss her so I take a step back, "I'll see you later," I whisper before I turn around and get my way out of there. 

Once in the car I sigh, I have to take a step back, to let her go. I don't want to but I have to, I'm too deep into this, into her. I close my eyes and lean my head on the wheel, I think I better break all contact with her.

A.N.: I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter?!
Do you think Harry really is going to take a step back from Kate? 
Don't forget to comment and vote. Thank you!
Have a nice weekend!
All the love,
K. x

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