chapter 17

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A few weeks later, it was really ordinary...

.... that is when you noticed that your best friend, Alya, seemed to chat with Adrien quite often.

You can't really get what they're talking about, but what bugs you off is when you and Alya were talking and he just had to interrupt and pull her out of your conversation to talk to her.

Can't he wait 'til later?!

In response, you would just roll your eyes, pick a sheet of paper, and doodle.

The next days were the same; you and Alya were talking, he'd interrupt you and wanted to speak with Alya saying that it was urgent, him not noticing Marinette anymore, him not bothering you, him not trusting you and relied on Alya instead when clearly, you were the best friend.

It's like you didn't even matter...


There it is again.

The emptiness, the sadness, the heartbreak.

But this time, you felt numb to it. It was like your used to it now. It felt nothing. You thought to yourself that you can do it now, because it's the second time around.

It was now lunchtime. You decided to ask your best friend Alya if she would like to eat lunch with you...

...that is, if she was there beside you.

Right now, she's having yet another conversation with Adrien Agreste. You sighed and gave up, deciding that you have to eat by yourself. Nathaniel would be a good idea, if he's not out there socializing with Alix and his other friends. Nino might also be a good idea, but he's with Alya and Adrien. Marinette...


She's with her own friends, Juleka and Rose.

You sighed again, going to the cafeteria and retrieve your lunch. Eating inside the classroom might be a good idea...

You started to eat. You munched and chewed on your food, but you can't swallow it. You tried, but it was so difficult. So instead of eating it, you played with the food, not feeling hungry anymore. You lost the appetite.

After throwing it inside the trash bin, you plugged in your earphones just as Adrien and Alya went inside. You hid your head in your arms as you placed it on the table. You didn't hear a word they were saying, but you were sure they're talking.

You breathed. You're dreading the next days coming, for you knew it was going to be the same. Your insides were wincing, you felt sick to the stomach, you can't breathe properly. Your feet and hands were cold and freezing. Your lips were quivering. Your eyes were starting to sweat and produce never ending tears. You can't seem to stop it all on your own. You don't want to say another word, or better yet, squeak another sound. You don't want anyone to hear you crumble on the inside.

You let out a short, raspy breath as you clutched your stomach, keeping it from grumbling from hunger and pain. You almost smiled, no one actually cared for you. No one actually heard you. No one actually liked you.

And you're alright with it.

Or are you?

end of chapter seventeen


i know the reader's kinda overreacting in a few chapters, but keep in mind that this is based on my experience and this was exactly what i felt after being completely abandoned and left behind. like right now. so yeah, please understand :)

also, sorry for my long absence. i had an exam and had to write a research paper. it was extremely tiring and stressful. hopefully, this short chapter will show that the book is not dead yet!!!

s a y o n a r a


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