20 First Kisses

Secret Writings

Simon

"Pen. Pen. Penny. Penny. Penelope!" I nearly shout at her. She's sitting across from me, reading a book and pretending like she can't hear me.

"Yes, Simon?" she asks, finally raising her eyes to look at me.

"Look at him," I say, absentmindedly tearing at the scone on the plate in front of me.

"Who?" she asks, closing her book with a sigh.

"Baz," I whisper, pushing the remains of my scone aside. Penny turns slightly in her seat to look at the table where Baz and his friends are sitting.

I look, too. Baz is scribbling rabidly in a notebook, ignoring whatever Dev is saying beside him. A stray strand of dark hair falls into his face, and he shoves it away with the hand that isn't holding the pen. (Knowing Baz, it's probably a very expensive brand of pen.)

"What about him? Penny asks. I tear my eyes away from Baz and turn them on Penny's exasperated face.

"He hasn't stopped writing since he sat down." Penny's eyebrows raise slightly, but she doesn't say anything. "I think he's plotting something."

Penny sighs, again, and rolls her eyes. "What makes you think he's plotting something? He could be doing homework."

I glance at Baz again, and he still has his head down. It looks like he has given up on his hair because more of it has fallen into his face out of its usually slicked-back state. It looks nice, and I wish for a moment that I was close enough to run my fingers through it. Shaking that thought out of my head, I turn back towards Penny. She's watching me with her tea poised in front of her mouth.

"He doesn't have any textbooks with him," I point out. "He's probably plotting my demise while we just sit here and watch. I'm going to find out what he's up to."

"Fine, but I'm not helping you this time." I barely hear her because Baz has just closed his notebook and is standing up.

I watch as he rakes his pale hand through the contrasting strands of dark hair, trying to get it back under control. He says something to Dev and Niall before walking out of the dining hall.

I feel a sharp pain in my knee and turn and look sharply at Penny. "What did you kick me for?" I ask.

"No reason," she says innocently. "But you should probably hurry and finish eating before you end up late to class."

I just barely keep from rolling my eyes at her. I'm more worried about whatever Baz is plotting than I am about missing class.

***

I sit behind Baz in most of our classes together, so I have a pretty good view of whatever it is that he's doing. He somehow manages to both take notes and write in that other notebook. I'm too far away to see what it is that he's writing, though. I'm not sure how he manages to do both when I can barely manage to make it appear like I'm taking notes while also keeping an eye on him.

He's so absorbed in his notebook all day that he doesn't sneer - or even look - at me once. It feels strange to not be the recipient of one of his snide comments. Whatever he's plotting must be really bad if it takes up this much of his concentration because he never misses an opportunity to taunt me. I need to find out what he's up to quickly.

After dinner, I beat Baz back to our room. I don't have to wait long for him to arrive, though. I'm seated at my desk with a textbook open in front of me when he walks in. I don't look up, and he doesn't say anything. This isn't unusual for us since we usually try to stay out of each other's way as much as possible.