Why do teens group up in threes?
Because they can't even
Peter: DAD JOKES! GO!
Tony: In able to have a party in space you have to planet
Steve: A clown held the door for me. I thought that was a nice jester
Bucky: The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one Byte. And then everything crashed.
Loki: This guy had his whole left side cut off. He's all right now
Shuri: This guy got hit in the head with a soda. He was lucky it was a soft drink
Stephen: "Doctor, there's a patient on line 1 that says he's invisible" "Well, tell him I can't see him right now."
Natasha: Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me. It means a lot.
Wanda: I remember being in so much debt that I couldn't afford my electricity bills, it was the darkest time of my life.
Vision: My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."
Bruce: Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
Clint: Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.
Sam: I just found out I'm colorblind. The diagnosis came completely out of the purple.
Thor: The future, the present and the past walked into a bar. Things got a little tense.
Peter: A cop just knocked on my door and told me that my dogs were chasing people on bikes. My dogs don't even own bikes...
Gamora: I was addicted to the hokey pokey... but thankfully, I turned myself around.
Quill: Claustrophobic people are more productive thinking out of the box.
Wade: What's the difference of deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are a $1.75, but deer nut are under a buck.
Drax: To the mathematicians who thought of the idea of zero, thanks for nothing!
Mantis: What did E.T.'s mother say to him when he got home? "Where on Earth have you been?!"
Rocket: I accidentally handed my wife a glue stick instead of a chapstick. She still isn't talking to me.
Groot:At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he's adopted?
T'Challa: My girlfriend said, "You act like a detective too much. I want to split up." "Good idea," I replied. "We can cover more ground that way."
Hela: R.I.P boiled water. You will be mist.
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That's right, someone gave Thor a phone. Watch out for the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man and his Iron Dad. Stephen Strange got another WiFi password. And more things coming your way. Started: July 5th, 2018