Project: Socialize (Chapters 1-197)

87. Serenity

After her counseling, I accepted her inevitable death. I accepted the fact that within a year, Luna will die. I initially felt a tormenting pain weighing me down in my heart, but now... that anguish has disappeared. In its place was a warm feeling, one of acceptance and appreciation. I felt as if I was able to see life from a different perspective outside of my prison cell. It was Luna that freed me from my fetters and into this world.   

After that lunch period on the rooftop of our school, I promised her that I will remain happy for her and for myself. It was a promise of companionship, one that will involve me trying my best to spend time with her and leave behind no regrets. I hoped that by doing so and carving her image into my soul, I would be able to see her off with a smile during her funeral. Therefore, I slowly started to change.

Everyday of that week, I anticipated for lunch, knowing that if I were to make my way to the rooftops, she'll be waiting for me there with that lovely smile and a meal. We'll be alone, just the two of us, and although we never did anything extremely out of the ordinary, it is this simple daily life that I believe is the most memorable. There's no need for special occasions, all that I needed to remember her was that smile of hers and the warmth of her body as we sat next to each other in our usual spot at the rooftop.

After school, Luna would occasionally come by and visit our club. Because of this, she slowly started becoming close with the other members of the club, notably Irina. Since we didn't have anything to do for our club, they would leave after school and spend some time together while also dragging Muria along. On the next day, everybody would go together to regular entertainment spots for high school students such as karaoke or a movie theater.

Because of this meaningful week, I slowly changed. I realized that I no longer felt as lonely as before, and it would appear that my behavior also changed since I would occasionally hear remarks from my classmates as they whispered among themselves. For example, at the beginning of lunch today, as I placed my textbook and notebooks back into my school bag, I heard two girls whisper nearby.

"Is it just me but is Alevian smiling a bit more recently?" one would whisper to the other.

"I think you're right," her friend would answer. "What should I do? His face is totally my type."

I didn't get the chance to hear the remainder of their conversation because I was in a hurry to my destination. Since lunch was only about an hour long, I wanted to maximize the time I have with Luna. Therefore, at the beginning of every lunch, I would immediately head to the rooftops and avoid making conversation with others just so I could get there a few seconds earlier.

Today was no different than the days before. When I opened the door to the roof, she was standing there, basking in the sun as the gentle autumn wind moved her long silvery-white hair. Upon hearing the door open, she would turn and smile at me, showcasing to me a breathtaking beauty like that of a frost flower.

We sat down in our usual spot and took out our lunch. I had started bringing my own lunch since it was kind of embarrassing always eating Luna's. Therefore, the two of us ate in silence and had a casual conversation as we stared at the blue sky overhead and feel the cool wind that autumn brought with it.

"Alevian," she said while leaning against me after we had finished eating. "Let's go to the mall after school today."

"Not even gonna ask if I have time?" I sighed.

"You don't have any plans, right?" she looked over at me and smiled. "And if you do, cancel it. You should be prioritizing spending time with me, someone who's dying soon."

"That voice and attitude of yours sure doesn't seem like it belongs to someone who's gonna die soon," I chuckled. "Fine. I'll go with you."

"Great!" she smiled and then proceeded to lean her head on my shoulder.