You are the God and weight of her world.
I rock Melody in my arms as I try to get her bag ready for her appointment with the doctor. Jax and I wanted to get her checked on after the kidnapping to make sure she's okay, and there's no damage done to our precious girl. She lets out a small yawn and I smile down at her, running a hand over her head, brushing back her dark hair. I press a gentle kiss against her forehead and I hold her tightly, not wanting her to go anywhere.
I finish packing her bag and toss it over my shoulder, rushing through the house to find my keys and wallet. I pack them in the tote bag and check my watch, noticing that I still have about 35 minutes until the appointment. I get out of the house, locking the door behind me and buckling Melody into her seat in my SUV. I get into the driver's seat and let out a sigh, looking back at my daughter and then leaning back into my seat, my shoulders falling as I let out a small cry, blaming and angry at myself for letting her get in the way of danger.
I shake my head, rubbing the tears away from my face. I look at my reflection in the rear-view mirror and run a hand through my long dark hair. Jax and I decided that it would be good for me to take a while off work so that we can help Melody and the boys adjust again after the situation. Well, Jax mainly wanted to make sure I was okay, and he knows me well enough to know that I won't work on healing if I'm working, I'll use my work as an excuse.
I let out a deep breath and start the car, making sure it was safe to back out of the driveway. I head to the hospital and pull into the parking lot. I notice few bikes and sigh, knowing that there would be 'security' here for me. I park the car and get out, carefully unbuckling the sweet bundle of joy and holding her in my arms. I go to reach for the bag and a hand picks it up, taking it with them. I look up to my husband and give him a sad smile. I watch as his expression turns into a sad, painful one and he kisses the top of my head, pulling me into his chest and giving me a reassuring squeeze. "It's going to be okay, babe."
I nod, not saying much to him. I watch as he closes the door behind me and locks the vehicle, walking beside me into the hospital. I notice my dad and Chibs standing at the front doors, waiting for us. My dad gives me a reassuring wink, walking over to me and grinning at his granddaughter, taking her from my arms and giving her a sweet kiss. "My princess." He hums, getting lost in her eyes. "Hey baby." He greets me, pulling me into his side and kissing the side of my head. "How're you feeling?"
We walk towards the elevator and I shrug, "Exhausted." I admit, "I keep having nightmares, and I can't get it out of my head."
My dad sighs, nodding. "What can I do to help?"
I shake my head, "I'm not sure, Dad. I need to go to therapy or something, I don't know."
"Well, you need to focus on yourself. Jax and I will watch the kids for you, but we need you to make sure you're okay. If you're not okay, it'll ripple down onto those kids, and I know you're putting them before yourself."
I look up to my dad, giving him a defeated sigh. "How can I not put my own children before myself? Isn't that what a mother is supposed to do?"
My dad runs his free hand through my hair, giving the back of my neck a gentle squeeze. "A mother is supposed to love and protect. You're an incredible mom, but you've got to take care of yourself. Remember what your mom and I told you when you were younger?"
I nod, "You can't love anybody else until you love yourself."
He grins, "You've got it, baby." Melody reaches for his hair, tugging it gently to get his attention. Dad lets out a bit of a yelp and then looks down at her, smirking. "You used to do this to your mother all of the time. You were a bit of an attention hog."