Chapter 18

"Go!" I scowl annoyed.

Mark hesitates and after a moment, he finally accelerates and I frown annoyed as my phone continues to vibrate.

I know she's calling. I saw the guilt and remorse in her eyes when she saw the engagement ring, but that will change almost immediately when I talk to her. I haven't seen her so angry, so judgemental towards my past.

She saw my father behind my back just to pick at my past a little more.

Running my hands through my hair frustratedly, I turn my phone off and try to forget everything that just happened. But there's a huge hole in my stomach, I can't ignore. It's eating me alive.

"Can you drive any slower?!" I scowl at Mark and look over at Blaise who's sitting in the passenger seat.

"Sir, it's raining." Mark replies flatly and I roll my eyes as I look back down at my phone.

I turn my phone back on after a moment to send a message to Dr Calvert.

*can I see you now?

The reply is almost immediate.

*Sorry, Zayn. I have a session in 10 minutes. Is 10:30 okay?

*ten minutes is all I need. I'm heading to New York.

*come on over then. I'm sure I can squeeze you in.

When I arrive at Dr Calverts office, I realise I have no idea what I'm going to say to her. I haven't seen her in a while.

Victoria has. I guess it's my time.

"Zayn." Ella greets.

She closes the door behind me when I don't greet her. "How are you?"

Stupid question. Why do people ask such stupid questions?!

I'm fucking great, that's why I asked to come see you; Stupid question.

"What can I do for you?" She asks this time as she gestures me to sit.

I sigh. "Hear me out? I don't know."

She leans on the desk behind her and offers some refreshments which I deny. "Let's start with how are you? I haven't seen you in a while."

"Not so well obviously Ella." I scowl.

Stupid question.

"What's happening? Tell me." The concern is distintively heard in her voice. "Start off-" She pauses and thinks to herself. "Start off from the time you were last here. That was almost two weeks ago."

"A lot has happened."

A lot always happens when I'm around Victoria.

"Victoria tells me you are taking your pills."

I scoff and roll my eyes. "Yeah."

"How is that going for you?"

I rub my head in frustration. "My pills are fine. My life isn't. I didn't come here to talk about bipolar and shit you didn'n't diagnose me with till recently! I came to talk about stuff that is happening now! I can't function properly!" I almost yell, but I have more control over my anger now.

Thank the pills, I guess.

"What's going on then, Zayn?" She questions, still calm.

After a frustrated sigh, I fill her in with all the shit thats happened. It feels good to get it off my chest, but at the same time, I wish it was Victoria I was talking too. At least Ella can keep her mouth shut when I'm trying to explain what happened and what I'm thinking.

Frost bite - Z.M (Book 3, Cold trilogy)Read this story for FREE!