How to Say Thank You

12. Another Day Out

FUCK I am sooooo sorry for not updating!! I didn't know what to write!! I know what I want to happen later, but I can't just skip a large amount of time, and I needed something to fill the gap. Enjoy the story!! 

PICTURE is Adam in case you were wondering? 

My time without Luke was passing by slowly. The first few days were the worst. With each night I slept less and less, the accident haunting my dreams. It was hard. The thing that had been keeping me grounded was gone, and now I was out of control. I was exhausted due to my lack of sleep. That made me unmotivated and moody. I was so tired and I had so many mood swings, some days I even stayed home at school. I didn't get punished though, perks of being in a tragic accident. It didn't even affect my grades. It also helped that we only have a month of school left, then it's summer.

I haven't left the house in about a week in a half, so about the day after the guys left. I had no reason to. My music therapist came to my house daily and besides her, Adam was the only person I talked tom, not even my parents, if they even cared. He would come into my room and we would watch movies that I wouldn't pay attention to. I would sit there in the dark, lying next to my brother, and think about Luke.

Some days Adam would have a friend over, some guy named Jack. Those were the days where I was left, just me and my thoughts. Those were the days I cried uncontrollably and repeated over and over that I hated my life, but then I would remember that I have a boyfriend that really cares for me and a brother who loves me. I would remember that if I just keep trying, I will remember the first sixteen years of my life eventually.

We texted, of course, but the time difference made it hard for us to do it often, and even when the time worked out, he would always have recording or practice or something to do with the band. We have only talked on the phone once, and that was about four days ago.

I miss him, I really do. I know that our time together was short lived, but that doesn't change the fact that Luke and I have a bond with each other that is special, beyond anything else. I'm not saying I love him, because to be quite honest, I don't think I have made it to that point yet, but the feelings that I have aquired for Luke are deeper than any feelings I have for anyone around me.

As Adam walked into the room with chocolate ice cream and brownies in his hands, I sighed to myself. This is all I have been doing for the past week and a half, of course I feel like shit. I am doing myself no favor by sitting on my ass and loading up on junk food. I need to get out of the house, that's what will make me feel better.

"Adam," I called to him as he started to sit on my bed. He looked at me as he shoved a brownie into his mouth. "I want to go somewhere," I told him.

"Well where do you want to go?" he asked me. I thought about it for a second. What could make me feel better?

"Shopping!" I shouted. "Can you take me shopping... please?" I begged. His face turned sour as he shook his head.

"No way, Leigh. I am not taking you shopping." I maneuvered myself to sit infront of him as I placed my hands on his knees.

"Adam! I want to go shopping. I need to get out of the house, and you're the only person I want to talk too. Besides the casheirs who work in stores at the mall," I grinned.

"Fine!" he gave in. I pounced on my brother and hugged his neck. "But I'm not going into Victoria's Secret with you again. That was a mistake that I only had to make once." I furrowed my brow in confusion, not remembering whatever event he had just reffererred to.

"Care to explain?" I teased him with a smirk.

"I forget that you don't remember things pre-accident," he told me. I looked down at my fiddling fingers. It still bothers me sometimes when I talk about the accident.