Number Eighty-One

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A compliation of LadyPolka.

...

Screw it, I'm a fish

***

Person: You're insane!

Me: Ha! I'm the sanest person I know!

Person: O.O

***

*about to eat a hard-boiled egg on the floor*

*mom calls me to do something*

*goes to do that "something"*

*goes back to room to eat egg*

*ants have covered the egg*

Motherf-

*sprays with air freshener*

*chokes on air*

***

B!tch ate my chocolate?

I ate her face!

***

Karma's a b!tch

***

*under blanket* I'm hot

*on blanket* I'm cold

I CAN'T WIN!

***

Me: Ugh, I feel like I ate a 3-pound marshmallow

*looks around* Wait, where's my pillow?

...

...

...

...wait a second...

***

*Me drinking milk*

*friend tells a really funny joke*

*spits milk out at other friend by accident*

***

I don't care what you do today. I don't care if you even screw a fish. But if you pour your cereal in my dang Pikachu bowl, I will personally start World War III

***

YOU JUST GOT! -slaps- BITCH SLAPPED!

***

Why aren't I sane?!

***

Break phone, cry

Fail test, cry

No food, cry

Pokémon ends, dies

***

Well, that's all for now. See y'all soon!

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