Tired of Pain [Mikoto X Depressed!Reader]

One: Secrets

SETTING; HOMRA BAR

I sighed, turning over on my side, I pulled the blanket a bit. As I tug on it, trying to pull it over my cold body, it gets ripped away from me. I groan, curling into a ball on the black comforter.

"Y\N, you can't sleep all day." the motherly figure told me, walking to the other side of the room.

"You're turning twenty-one in two days, I can't keep waking you up like this, you're not a child." he told me, opening up the curtains, light bursting throughout the room.

I gave an unsatisfied grunt, before he pulled me off of the bed and onto the floor.

"That's it, up, now. I didn't want to have to be hard on you, but you need to get up. Now." he laid down strictly, making my bed.

"Please-" he cut me off as soon as I started.

"No please, no! Get in the shower! We've barely seen you all week, you've been attached to this bed for nearly a month now, I've seen you eat twice, that's it!" he shouts, gripping me by my shoulders and hoisting me up onto my feet.

I started to cry, hugging onto him.

"I can't- I can't do it-" I starting sobbing lightly.

"Y\N, stop! Get in the goddamned shower, now!" he dropped me on the ground, stomping to my bedroom door.

"I'm coming back in here in thirty minutes, and I better hear that shower head running!" he warned, slamming the door behind him.

After laying face-down on the floor for a while, I slowly and unsteadily started to get off of the floor.

I shuffled my way into the bathroom, turning on the light, and sliding open the shower door.

I looked at my messy disheveled self in the mirror, not wanting to remove my warm clothes.

My hair looked like a rat's nest, sat atop my head, covering my face, my bright E\C eyes shining through.

I wore a grey hoodie and black sweatpants that hadn't been washed in who knows how long. I didn't even remember what underwear I wore underneath.

I slowly started to slide my hoodie off, seeing my starved body in the mirror, I sneered at myself in disgust. I slowly stripped off my pants as well, letting them fall loosely to the floor.

I had boring black boxer-briefs on, and a black sports bra. Neither of which fit.

I turned away from the mirror and took off my underwear, not wanting to see the rest of my hideous body.

I went to hold the shower door, noticing my scars that the hoodie covered.

They just made me want to cry even more.

I stepped into the shower, stepping all the way to the back and turning on both the hot and cold water at the same time, trying to heat the water up quickly.

Meanwhile...

"I just hope she's actually getting up. I'm worried about her Mikoto. She's taken it the worst out of all of us."

I heard a short grunt of agreement from my right, as I turned on the faucet behind the counter, washing my hands.

After a short conversation with Mikoto, I walked back up the stairs, pausing at her door.

I opened it slowly, stepping in. I could hear the shower head ticking as the water roughly hit the walls of the shower.

I started gathering clothes, a T-shirt and some black jeans with a black pair of socks for her to put on after the shower.

I walked out to the towel closet to retrieve her one, returning back to her room.

I sat her fresh, folded clothes on her bed while I grabbed her towel and headed into her bathroom.

I knocked, before I called, "Y\N, are you done?" I was answered with silence, so I slid open the shower door to find her sitting in a ball on the shower floor.

I walked over, turning off the shower and wrapping the towel around her, I stood her up, and walked her out of the shower.

"I prepared you some clothes. Get changed and come downstairs for breakfast when you're finished." I told her, squeezing her shoulder before exiting her room.

Back to...

I stood there for a moment before getting very dizzy. I quickly stumbled over to my bed, sitting down. I sat there for a while, until I finally snapped out of my daze, and looked at the clothes he gave me.

I picked up the underwear he picked out for me. Simple black boxer-briefs and a simple black and white sports bra.

I put them on as quickly as I could, trying to keep the towel around me for warmth. As soon as I got my underwear on, I ditched the towel and grabbed my blanket, wrapping it around me.

I slowly reached out for the clothes, putting them on under the blanket.

Once I was finished getting dressed, I slid out of the bed, grabbing a white hoodie from my dresser, quickly putting it on to cover my scars.

I opened my door, walking down the stairs. I shoved my hands in my pocket.

"Here." he, Izumo, handed me a hairbrush.

I gave him a nod as a thank you, beginning to brush through my hair, I sat down at the bar.

I could feel Mikoto's gaze on my back.

After being served breakfast, I poked at the eggs for a little while before I got up and threw it away, walking out of the bar to sit on the bench outside.

I pulled my hood up, placing my hands in my pocket, I tilted my head down, closing my eyes.

I opened them a few moments later, looking up.

Mikoto was sat next to me, a cigarette in his hand.

We sat in silence for a little while as he finished his cigarette. Once he had finished, he threw the bud on the ground, stomping his boot on it.

He looked over at me, Amber eyes piercing. I didn't return the gaze, staring at the ground.

He reached over, I flinched. He pulled my arm over to him, pulling my sleeve up. I flinched again at the pain, my face still blank.

His face seemingly became paler than it was.

One: Secrets unkept