He was never one to care for anything.
The last time he cared for something?
Maybe the time he spent with his father, the times he pretended to be the pilot of the falcon...That damn ship...
He absolutely adored his father when he was younger, eager for his return from whatever adventure he was on, patiently waiting for the stories his father brought with him, and the little trinkets Chewie collected for the boy. As time went on, his father's trips were longer, and longer, the number of days becoming too large to count.
And his mother... He did admit, at one point he did care for her, too. He admired the way she ruled, the way she led a rebellion no matter what situation she faced.
However, that's all she was. A leader, never a mother, at least not to him. He saw her more than his father, that much was true, but when he did see her, she was distracted with new plans and new advantages. She knew so much of war, but in his mind, so little of him. As a boy, he pictured himself growing up to become the best pilot in the galaxy, making his father proud and satisfying his mother.
Ben Solo could have achieved that, if he was given that chance.
Instead, his resentment grew to the point of no return, too much for General Leia Organa to deal with. She could not keep an eye on him, could not spare a moment apart from her war to tend to her son, to care for him tenderly and lovingly just as he had seen others do with their own kin.
No one was willing to give him a chance, to listen, to care for him. He was only a child, and to feel this at such a young age, drew only darkness into his soul, and there it grew, it's roots far too deep to simply rip away especially when his mother sat him down to explain his parents decision to send him to his Uncle Luke's academy.
They prayed and hoped that Luke's teachings would rid him of the evil that loomed, unaware that this choice only made it sprout even more.
The only one that would take the time to speak with him, to tell him of the greatness he would one day reach, was Snoke, a ruler of darkness himself.
Snoke clung to the dark that haunted Ben, sneaking in the shadows, acting as a whisper in the wind. He witnessed the young boys every action, every conversation, every feeling, and eventually took rule of that too.
To Ben Solo, Snoke was a friend, a confidant.
To Snoke, Ben was a pawn until he was able to lure him to the dark side, taking full advantage of Ben Solo's mind as he slept when Luke Skywalker peered into the young boy's mind. Snoke cast a horrific gloom into Ben's mind, letting an outright nightmare play for Luke as Ben slept.
Seeing only the images that played in Ben's head, hearing only the screams and cries in the background, Luke acted on his immediate fear and raised his lightsaber, promising to banish this darkness that consumed his nephews mind. Gaining his composure, he knew this was not the way, and in the same moment, Ben Solo's eyes flew open at the push of Snoke in his mind, his view filling with his uncle, weapon raised above him.
The young man knew right then that every word Snoke spoke was true, he was alone and his family's fear would drive them apart, afraid that his own power was too much, and they would either try to contain him or try to kill him.
And so, Ben, the son of the great Han Solo and Princess Leia, was erased from this world, and the Prince of darkness rose as Kylo Ren, and now, the Supreme Leader of the First Order.
With a shaky sigh, Kylo Ren glanced towards the bed that Rey ley upon in the med bay of the Resistance base. He carried her weightless body to the near empty room he had passed when he first searched for her, noticing the MD-15C medical droid standing still in the corner of this room.
YOU ARE READING
Set right after the battle on Crait. Rey and Ben Solo / Kylo Ren, the conflicted souls, are eager for the other to join their own side, a tale of light vs. dark. Will their story land in the grey? Slow burn Reylo, lovely smut in later chapters.