"Hello, everyone. My name is Marguerite Fuchs, and this is September 13, 2014, version of 'The 1300 podcast; where we talk about what's happening in New York and around the world! Last night at Sycamore University an 8-foot "werewolf" was reported running amok during a silent demonstration in Westward Park.
"The werewolf was wreaking havoc amongst the bystanders until a group of scantily clad females pummeled the monster presumably to death by electrocuting and setting the beast on fire. Most of the people in attendance who watched these events unfold celebrated with the 'magical females' as they teleported the creature and themselves from the scene.
"Many people around campus had no idea who were the five individuals who stopped the monster but are much indebted to those who have put their lives on the line to prevent such a ravenous beast. As for such a beast, its whereabouts are where the unknown and at this point most say the five individuals have disposed of the creature.
"Moments ago, an FBI investigation hooked 32 people that were involved in a massive LSD and Ecstasy ring that had ties to an alleged hate crime involving of a transsexual four years ago. The FBI decided to reopen the case with new evidence. It appears they won't be weaseling themselves out of this one since most of the evidence directly links Delta Theta Omega, a fraternity that strangely had most of their charges dropped four years ago.
"Many people are now outside the Delta Theta Omega for another silent protest being held for Haley Larson, the transsexual female who was brutally assaulted by the Delta Theta Omega brothers four years ago.
"As of right now, the Delta Theta Omega fraternity claims to be innocent of these charges, but with the re-filing of the assault charges and new evidence of drug distribution by the feds, many people are now wavering their trust over once the most prominent fraternity of New York City."
Somewhere in Israel, a mountainous middle-aged nephalem man in a casual suit was smoking a cigar and listening to 'The 1300 Podcast' in the middle of the day on his iPhone. He had red and black hair with bright orange cat-like eyes. He was tall and muscular for his age.
He decided to have enough news for the day and enjoys his cigar. He was staying at a villa near the ocean. Use thinking about going to town and getting himself a sweet cold beverage to start his workday. But he felt kind of lazy, and he shouldn't be drinking on the job anyway.
Then, one of his assistants rushes in unannounced. He was wearing a casual suit as well. What he had is long black hair that was slicked back, but he wore glasses with a 5 o'clock shadow. Usually, he has bad news, "Mr. Valentina. It's them. They're at it again. They left New York and heading back to Spain."
Mr. Valentina scoffed that the idea as he puffed on his cigar, "What is wrong with this guy, Eric? I mean what did he expect dealing with four-legged animals who don't know any better? It's not a damn game."
Mr. Valentina always had a problem not taking people far too seriously. Fortunately for Mr. Valentina, Eric --his assistant-- does all his worrying for him.
He started to get a little bit serious since it really does affect his bottom line as well, "look. The last thing I need right now is Eichner pretending to be the next Pope while using a bunch of big-titted sluts to do his holy killing for him. We need to put an end to this."
Dreading the fact that he doesn't have a well-thought-out plan, but at least he got Mr. Valentina on the same page, "I'm working on it..."
"Well, you need to work on it right now," his boss encouraged while patting him on the back.
"Yeah, I got it," Eric shuffles out of the room.
Finishing off his cigar, Mr. Valentina violently snuffs it out with his palm, "Delete!"
Suddenly, he received a call from the secretary, "Mr. Valentina, Dr. Harker's here to see you!"
"So, she made it here in one piece. Send her in." Mr. Valentina ordered.
A few minutes later, Dr. Harker who was wearing a sundress arrived at his villa.
In his living room, Mr. Valentina meets up with the biology doctor.
"Dr. Leona Harker, I just received your test results," he greeted.
Dr. Harker was a bit nervous and flustered at the site of her employer, "Y-yes, I hope everything was to your liking. I wanted to find a suitable test subject but hope that was sufficient."
"Indeed, it was. I am very excited that you crack the code so easily," he praised while taking her hand and kissing it softly.
Dr. Harker blushed, "It took me some time, I was very eager about getting the results to you sooner rather than later."
"Patience is a virtue that I hold dear to my heart, Leona," Mr. Valentina flirted. "Be grateful and rejoice to know that you have made a believer out of me."
Feeling a bit embarrassed, Leona cleared her throat and acknowledged his sincerest thanks, "always a pleasure, Mr. Valentina. I have the vials and the documents ready for your bioengineering team in Geneva."
"Hopefully, you will join them. After all, we need a supervisor who knows their way around the research," Mr. Valentina offered.
Hearing that, put Leona on cloud nine, "Mr. Valentina, I... I would be so honored to run the division for you."
"No, the honors all mine. And please, just call me Xerxes," he insisted with a devilish smile.
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