Infinity Ring (Legolas Love Story)

38. Burned Out

The king of the undead demanded Aragorn to release them.

"I hold your oath fulfilled," Aragorn declared. "Go, be at peace," he added, releasing the undead from their curse and we all watched as they vanished when the wind blew. 

I went to look for Leane. Aragorn and Gimli walked closely behind me. 

So many had fallen; too many lives spent on this war. I quickened my strides as I searched for Leane. Some men were walking around the field, looking for any survivors. On the other side of the field I heard someone wailed in pain and frustration.

"NO! NO!!!"

It was Eomer. He fell on his knees, wailing in sorrow as he held a limped body. I stopped in my track to see that he was holding Lady Eowyn, his sister that was dressed in men's armor.

Fear and sorrow gripped my heart tightly and I moved on to search frantically for Leane.

There, on the field between the dead bodies of men and horses, I found her kneeling on the ground with her back turned to me, her black strands of hair gave her away. Relief seeped through me as I saw her back heaving as she took breaths.

"Leane! Meleth nin!" I called to her and crouched as I arrived beside her.

I touched her shoulder and pulled her to hug her, thanking the Valar that they kept the love of my life alive and well.

But she didn't hug me back. Instead she was limp and unmoving. I could feel her whole weight rested against me. Something was wrong.

I pulled away a little to look at her face. Dried blood, tears and dirt smeared her face. But the emptiness that I found in her now bluish eyes shocked me. Fear once again gripped me tightly as cold ran down my spine.

"Leane? Leane?!" I shook her shoulders lightly but she didn't respond. 

I laid her head on my chest and tapped her cheek lightly with my han to wake her, to get her to respond to me. Nothing happened; the look on her eyes chilled me to the bone.

Her face and lips were white and pale; the color that usually was on her face was gone. The only color to be found was the redness on her puffy eyes that was caused by tears.

"Leane? Please answer me!" I tried again, tapping her cheek with a little more force but she didn't respond to my call.

Gimli and Aragorn came to my side, along with Gandalf.

"What ails her?" asked Aragorn with concern as he pressed a finger to her neck and checked for her pulse, then examining her for her breathing. I shook my head frantically.

"I do not know! She was fine when I saw her earlier! Now I found her like this!" I exclaimed in worry and fear.

"Lassie..." Gimli said in disbelief as he saw Leane on my arms. "Look at her hands," he added suddenly.

For the first time I looked at her hands. It was bloodied and her equally bloodied sword was still gripped tightly on her right hand. Then I looked at what was in front of her.

Bella, her horse that I gave her lay dead with a blade sticking out of the side of the horse's body, and a slit was found on her neck.

The slit that was fit Leane's sword.

My heart plummeted down to my stomach as I realized what had taken place in my absence.

Leane was forced to kill her horse with her own hands to end the animal's misery. And she had loved the horse immensely.

She had also killed men for the first time today. A pain that wasn't physical stabbed my chest painfully and I closed my eyes for a moment, willing the pain to go away but it didn't.

This was one of the reason why I wanted her safe from all of this, all this war. I wanted to protect her body as much as I wanted to protect her innocent soul. But I failed. I knew what it was like to take life. It was something that will haunt me forever but I could not imagine killing when you were an empath. This scar will haunt her conscience for life now.

"What ailed her was not a bodily wound, Legolas," Gandalf stated grimly, confirming my fears. 

"Her soul is compromised against her conscience. She came from a world of peace; untouched by war and its losses. Yet now this reality hit her. She is unprepared for this and took the blow harder than the rest of us who had lived through war and death shadowing our lives."

My heart constricted painfully as I looked at Gandalf. He looked down at me with sympathy, for once I saw his tired eyes as years swam in his ever knowing eyes.

My arms tightened around Leane's body as her empty eyes stared at the sky above us. I brushed a hand through her hair and leaned down to whisper an ancient sleeping spell on her ear.

Her grip on her sword loosened and the sword clang on to the ground as she closed her eyes the moment I finished chanting the spell.

I embraced her and buried my face on the crook of her neck. I hated myself for what I had let happened to her. Aragorn clapped my back in sympathy and I looked up to see my friends looking down at me with concern.

I breathed in and out, strengthening myself then stood with Leane on my arms. All of us walked silently as we strode past the dead bodies to the direction of Minas Tirith. 

***

[Author's note: Just to explain in case some people don't get what happened to Leane. Her horse was wounded in the battle and she could feel her horse's pain, so she had to kill her horse to end its pain. Remember how she felt about animals: She saw animals, especially her horse as pure and innocent. She had loved the horse immensely that killing it sort of wounded her conscience. Imagine the adrenalin rush fading and all that happened, plus herself remembering the look on the dead guys' eyes that she killed while at the same time being able to feel what her victims felt. And being surrounded by thousands of dead bodies. It's PTSD at work.]