Google helped me

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⚠️Double update! Read this chapter first!!!⚠️
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"I'm glad to see that tutoring is helping, Brandon." Ms. Garcia smiles at me as she hands my test back to me, a large red 'B-' splayed across the top. 

I stare at the letter like it's some foreign symbol that I have to translate. I've watched Sesame Street as a child and I remember all too well when the letter of the day was B, yet somehow, seeing it on my math test doesn't comprehend in my head. 

It may seem like a small accomplishment to some, but I actually passed a math test. I may have well just won a noble peace prize in my eyes! 

"You're still not technically passing the class, but you're showing improvement. Coach Roman will be pleased to hear this." a small smile sits on her lips as she watches me continue to stare at the red B in astonishment. 

I was so sure that I was doing it wrong because it was making sense, but a passing grade on the test is awesome. I can't fit the goofy grin that crosses my face as the realization finally starts to click in place. If Ms. Garcia wasn't my teacher I'd hug her from excitement.

Instead, I settle with for a quick thank you before rushing into the hallways. My fingers clutch the paper tightly like it is Willy Wonka's golden ticket, my eyes scanning for Gunner or Miles, Alec or Lucy. Anyone who will be excited with me. 

Am I overreacting to a grade? Maybe.

But it's so much more than that. It's my ticket to play baseball again. To resume my plans to try and get seen by a scout. It's a glimpse at my future. 

"Lucy!" my eyes land on her small frame, taking books out of her locker and I move through the bodies to get to her.

She lets out a surprised laugh as my arms wrap around her waist, pulling her off the floor and spinning her around in excitement. 

"Baby!" she giggles out, arms grasping tightly to me so I don't drop her.

The nickname feels weird coming from her lips. Like when you're at a restaurant and the waitress calls you sweetie or hun. I don't particularly like it, but I don't acknowledge it.

"I passed the math test!" I all but shove the paper into her hands after I put her feet on the ground. 

"That's great! I guess Miles' is one hell of a tutor then." the mention of Miles sends a jolt to my chest.   

He'd been tutoring me the last few days since Alec was still out, and he's smarter than what I would have guessed. I don't mean that in a bad way, he just didn't strike me as a math person. 

But something has been off with him lately. It's like he's on edge and the slightest movement would make him jump. I've tried to tell myself that it's nothing and has zero to do with me. However, when I see him at lunch, he seems fine. 

I know that I'm probably overthinking it and if I don't stop my mind is going to come up with some ridiculous conclusions. I just can't help it everytime he sits next to me explaining another problem. 

"Hey, we were just talking about you," I turn to see who Lucy is talking to and my heart thuds at the smile Miles gives us as he approaches.

I wish I could say he didn't look good, but dammit he does! His khaki cargo shorts and black shirt showcasing his tanned skin and toned arms and legs perfectly. My eyes snap to Lucy and I fight the blush that tries to cover my cheeks at the thought. 

"All good things I hope," he laughs and I can't help but smile at the sound as he stands between me and Lucy. 

It's silent for a beat and as if remembering something, Lucy jumps, moving to twine our fingers together. Guilt floods through me at how wrong her hand feels in mine, but I can't pull away. At least not without giving the impression to Miles that something is wrong. 

"You guys are cute together." Miles comments, his eyes moving to stare at our intertwined hands.

So many words flood my mine and now more than ever I want to break up with Lucy. There is something in Miles' tone or his stare that has the words moving to the tip of my tongue but I can't do it right now. 

It just seems cruel to do that with so many people around to witness it. She deserves a nice breakup if there is such a thing. 

"I have to get to class. I will see you both later." I unclasp my hand with Lucy's and give Miles a quick nod before making my way through the halls. 

~

I planned the entire breakup out during my last class. After baseball practice, I'm going to drive to her house. I'll bring her some nice flowers, girls like getting flowers, at least according to google. 

Yes, I googled what women like and it gave me two results; Flowers and honesty, which made my breakup speech the hardest thing to come up with. 

I don't think that I am ready to tell Lucy the whole truth. I don't think I'm ready to tell anyone the truth but I know of all the people, Lucy deserves to know. I just can't help feeling like it's not time yet. 

So I decided that I am going to tell her she is amazing for going along with this in the first place. I'll tell her that during this relationship time, she has really grown as a person. I'll put it all on me and tell her that I have seen how guys look at her and I don't want to hold her back from what could be an amazing relationship. 

"So what do you think of that?" I watch Gunner's face closely as he observes the plan I just laid out for him in his head. 

I smile as he begins to nod slowly, but my smile fades when he bursts out laughing. Tears stream down his face as he grabs his stomach and throws his head back in what I think is overdramatic hysterics. 

"You're an idiot," he squeaks out between rounds of laughter.

"What part of that is idiotic? I thought it all through," I throw my shoes in my locker, slamming the door a little harder than was probably necessary. 

I worked hard on the plan. Well Google and I did actually, but still. I was determined to have the best breakup possible and I thought it was sweet what I had come up with. 

"C'mon B. Flowers?" he chuckles again, closing his own locker, "Grown as a person?" 

I sigh as his laughter starts again, crossing my arms over my chest. I don't care what he says, I know that this is the right move. Maybe my speech can use some work, but I'm hoping that in the moment, it will come together. 

"It will blow up in your face, B, but good luck," Gunner slaps my hand in our signature handshake before leaving the locker room. 

His laughter echoing after him, but I'm not going to let it stop me. I'm going to break up with Lucy my way and I'm going to do it now. 

According to Google, the purple hyacinth flower symbolizes 'I'm sorry' and since there is no flower that says, 'I'm breaking up with you but that you for being my beard for as long as you have', seems like a safe choice.

However, Wal-Mart doesn't sell them. Only bright colored roses and sunflowers line their shelves. They're pretty, don't get me wrong, but it won't give off the same sentiment as the 'I'm sorry' flower. I guess it's better than nothing, but I'm not happy about it. 

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