Jealous ( jastin) ( On Hold)

02. I'm sorry..√

   I wake up feeling someone's gaze on me. My dad. He smiles down at me. I keep staring at him.

   " H.he isn't my baby anymore" I stutter.

    " What did Justin do to make my baby boy cry?" He smiles down at me." I can smack his ass"

   Even though it's not the best moment, I laugh a little. He knows how to make someone smile even in the darkest hour.

  Darkest hour, I frown again. This is the darkest hour in my life. Hearing my Justin saying that he's not my baby anymore is the worst thing that  can ever happen to me.

  Dad sighs." Jason. Can we talk about it?" He asks.

   I feel my eyes stinging needing to cry. But I nod. I need his help. I can't loose my baby boy. He's mine.

   I tell him everything. Everything that happened since I said Justin not to wear them ripped jeans.

   Everything to the moment he said that he's not my baby anymore.

  Dad sighs, crossing his arms.

    " I'm not surprised he said that Jason. You were wrong" he says. I look down.

   " I know! But I didn't rape him dad." I depend myself. I didn't.

   " Well Jason, if you touch him without his permission, then it's obvious that it's called rape."

   " He's mine! I can do anything I want to him. I'm his husband why don't you get it?!" I snap.

  He sighs, then grabs my wrist out of nowhere. He pulls out a pocket knife and forces my palm up. " Dad what the hell!" I try to pull away. But he's strong.

   He cuts my palm, and I cry out in pain as blood pours down my arm. " Dad stop!" I scream as he tries to cut my palm again. " Please!"

   " You're mine, I can do anything I want to you. I'm your father so I do this" he says. The self same thing I just said about Justin.

   " Now Jason, you can choose. Do you think I'm right and I should keep going or I'm wrong and should stop?" He presses the knife to my palm again.

  " Stop!" I cry out instantly. I'm wrong, I shouldn't have done that to Justin.

  He takes the knife away.

    " I'm sorry dad. I'm so sorry" I fall into his arms again, crying again. Now I know how Justin must have felt, I was stupid to not know better than hurting him.

  " Apologize to him, not me" he chuckles.

   " He wouldn't forgive me. I don't deserve him"

    " He can't live without you as much as you can't live without him Jason. He's gonna forgive you even when you don't deserve it. Just try it." Dad says before going to bring the first aid kit to clean my cut.

____

  I light up the last candle and sigh. The cinnamon scent filling the room from the red candles. I close the curtains so the room is pitch dark and the only light source is the candles. I look down at the red rose petals that are laying on the bed and the floor.

  I look at the plate of spaghetti and meatballs, I just made myself, just for my ba- Justin. I don't call him my baby again. Not until he gives his permission again. I did him wrong. I don't deserve him. But I can't stop being selfish enough to beg him for forgiveness. I won't live without him. And I don't wanna die. I wanna live with him, till we're gray and old.

  Btw, I made spaghetti and meatballs, along with a jug of fresh orange juice, Justin's all time favorite. I made apple pie for dessert. Also, his favorite. I bought the cotton candy ice cream too, his favorite flavor.