As I'm back stage, I see PJ staring at me intently, and I feel as though everyone knows. See the one rule at this club, is that while you work there, you can't date. We don't know why, it's just a rule. You can go on one date, and those are typically dates where people end up fucking you, then leave you.
As I walk out from backstage, I'm greeted by a crowd forming by the stage. Although I'm pretty thankful I'm not to be Chris, because all the creeps are at the stage now. Oh my god, my feet hurt. From these damn heels, but it's part of my job.
"Fancy seeing you here." I hear a familiar voice laugh, and it's when I see Phil.
"Phil why are you here?"
See I'm uncomfortable with him seeing, well this side of me. This isn't who I am, it's just a persona I put on.
"I'm at a bar, because I want to be, want to dance?" He asks, holding out his hand.
"Phil I don't think it's a great idea," I choke out, tears forming at my eyes, "I gotta go I'm almost up."
As I make dash for the stage, well as quickly as I can in this heels, I feel tears streaming down my face. Oh shit my makeup. I make my way towards the locker room, before I feel a hand up my skirt, and laughter. The hand doesn't move, and it wasn't an accident. I feel beyond violated and ready to beat the living shit out of somebody. I try to move, but I can't, as his hands snake around me, attempting to pull down my skirt.
The hands feel cold, and snake like, but rough, as they grope me. His teeth and mouth sucking on my neck. As I kick, squeal and squirm, the hands don't come off of me. Holy shit I'm done for.
"Get your hands off of me." I shriek, kicking.
"Oohhh a feisty one." I see a very disheveled, and quite drunk man. With black hair, and somehow taller than me, he continues to laugh.
His hand goes towards my crotch, and that's when I kick him, but miss when he moves. As he grabs me again, I know I'm done for, as I squirm and scream, hoping anybody can hear me.
"Hey leave him the fuck alone." A voice yells. Phil.
I watch in horror, as the man lets go of me and hits Phil straight in the face. Although It doesn't take him long before grabbing the man and pinning him to the ground.
"Get the fuck outta here you creep." Phil yells at the man he has pinned down.
As the man squeals in pain as I watch Phil slowly pinning his arm to his shoulder. He lets him go, and I've never seen a man run faster in my life. It's at that moment I realize that I'm crying, and Phil apparently sees too.
"Dan, hey, get your clothes from the locker room, and I'll take you home?" He asks softly.
I nod, making my way to the locker room, grabbing my clothes, I look in the mirror. That's when I nearly break down, seeing the red marks across my neck. Changing quickly, I shove everything into my bag, and walk back towards Phil.
"Come on." He yells over the music, as we walk out the doors of the bar, into the dark street.
As we walk back, some part of me is terrified, terrified of the man coming back. It's then I realize I'm still crying, as we walk into my apartment.
He looks at me nervously, playing with his lip ring. I then realize his nose is still bleeding.
"Oh my god, Phil your nose!"
"Yea can I get a tissue?" He asks casually.
He's casual, about his fricking nose bleeding?
I pass him a tissue, as he holds it to his nose.
"Hey Phil, would you like to stay the night?" I ask hesitantly, and he nods.
"Sure, let's watch a movie, but I gotta grab some clothes, so I'll be right back."
As I grab a movie and some popcorn, he's back just as it finishes popping, and I'm unbelievably nervous about having him spend the night. Although I really just don't want to be alone.
We sit on the couch, a bowl of popcorn between us.
As we watch the movie, he starts to fall asleep. I notice the red marks across his neck and frown, are those hickeys? Did that guy seriously give him hickeys. That's when I realized, yes, yes he did, I watched him. A pang of guilt hits me, wishing I would've done something to protect the small boy.
As I continue watching the movie, I feel a weight on my shoulder. Looking towards my shoulder, I see a head of curly hair leaning on my shoulder. The coffee brown curls tickling my neck, warm breath against my shoulder. I just let him lay there, I don't touch him, that would be bad.
Although the question is, when was the last time anyone gave any loving attention to this boy? Looking down, I see his small hand clinging to my shirt, knuckles white. Scratch that, when was the last time anybody cuddled with him? Loved him? Made him feel special? Anything?
When he wakes up tomorrow, he'll probably be embarrassed, but I really don't mind. His little breaths, and the rise and fall of his chest, enough to calm me. Enough to make me wish I could stay like this forever. As I turn off the TV, and pull the blanket over us both, my thoughts run wild.
Hell I was one of the guys that wanted to fuck him. Then I realized, he is a person, with feelings, that day at the coffee shop... he really thought I wanted to fuck him and leave. I don't, I want to stay, truly. I want to stay for as long as possible.