Reminder: Bitter Feelings vs. Better Feelings

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This afternoon, someone did something that made me feel upset. I was a little annoyed and a little hurt, but then I remembered it was Ramadan tomorrow. I didn't want to start off Ramadan feeling this way; I didn't want to have bitter feelings towards another person. Ramadan is supposed to help me become a better person, which means no grudges. No negativity. 

A blog post I read put it in beautiful words:

"Bitterness is caused by hurt and anger, and the solution to bitterness is forgiveness, love, and the ability to forget. When we hold on to negativity, we are only harming ourselves. Forgive them on the spot for what they are doing or saying to you, and try not to hold resentment towards them. Don't allow yourself to steam and brood over what happened. When you have a negative feeling about someone, immediately replace it with a pleasant thought and make dua for them."

It's okay to feel upset, annoyed, and hurt. We are humans and we are made to experience and express these emotions. But, we need to be careful not to let those emotions dictate how we act and what we say. We shouldn't let our bitter feelings become bitter actions. 

This Ramadan, try to let go of the grudge you've been holding on to.

This Ramadan, forgive that person you said you'd never forgive.

This Ramadan, be forgiving; release the negativity and accept the positivity.

...it sounds a lot easier than it actually is, I know.

When I feel upset or annoyed or hurt because of someone, I find there are two things that help me forgive them:

1) think of all the nice things they've done; when you start listing them in your mind, suddenly, that thing that they just did doesn't seem that bad. Focus on the good.

2) give them a little gift; doing something nice for someone makes you feel good about yourself and makes everyone happy. In fact, the Prophet (s.a.w) said: "Exchange gifts, as that will lead to increasing your love to one another." (Bukhari)

How do you deal with bitter feelings?

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