Ch. 19 Monster

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I spent the hours sitting in the tub while hot water fell on me, I just want to pass out and forget. The wound on my chest that cut through my heart stop bleeding as it heal completely by itself, the pain was real too ignore as it still stayed. I just want this to be a dream. Is it always the reason I like him cause he did everything I couldn't do. I was too nice to hurt anyone. Yeah I yell and snap but I didn't always win the argument, I held back many stuff that could make a grown man cry. But I didn't I didn't want to hurt anyone. So many times I wish I could kick their ass, so many times I kill them all over again in my head. Have I become the monster I love.... the one that drives me nuts.

There was no way he could ever come back to my world, I don't how would I react to him being here again... it wouldn't be the same.

I went to the mall to take a walk hoping this memory will go off my mind, yet trouble came. Angelica and Jenny were related apparently double trouble. They notice my presence and began to follow me. My pace went up a notch, so did theirs. I took a quick peek behind my shoulder and I could clearly see them running towards with a pissed off face. They chase me down the woods, I was stop by other girls probably who had something with Grimmjow. I was surrounded. My heart was racing with fear. The urges were slowly overwhelming me a little by the time, I grab a stick and waving it around to scare them away. Though they got more aggressive. I couldn't take it anymore I black out. My eyes open and close, everything seem slightly blur and full of red....so much red. The screams faded, they were out of my sight. I look down to see I have stab someone with a stick at their arm. My hand was shaking, I wanted to do it again but someone stop me.

Grimmjow: "(_____) cut it out"

I let go off the stick and broke down crying. He took me away. We were in the place where we met for the first time ever.

You: "Why did you come again?"

Grimmjow: "I wanted to see if you were OK"

You: "I'm not OK"

Grimmjow: "How's your wound?"

You: "Is healed but it hurts"

Grimmjow: "I'm... sorry"

I couldn't believe he apologize. Though the last time he try to be nice he trick me.

You: "Don't you need to get back home soon?"

Grimmjow: "The story is over. I need to find another story to begin"

You: "You need to continue to live and be the new king of hueco mundo"

Grimmjow: "Many people believe I'm dead. Might as well take advantage of the situation and redo my life to whatever I wanted"

You: "That's nice well I hope you enjoy life back at Bleach"

Grimmjow: "No, I'm going stay here with you"

You: "Nooo, I don't want you to see what I become"

Grimmjow: "You only try to defend yourself, you were fucking amazing I could see the grace"

You: "I'm just a cold hearted monster, I don't want to kill"

Grimmjow: "Look at me. I have no feelings no heart and you got me all worked up. You got attach to me. And I learn the difference from lust and love"

You: "I'm afraid I might kill someone"

Grimmjow: "You don't have to do it all alone I can accompany you and we can both share the blame"

You: "You would do that for me?"

Grimmjow: "Yes. You turn me on when you become a psycho"

You: "Really?"

My ex Gregg showed up with a gun and started threatening me with it if I didn't follow him. I let the urges took over and as you know I just saw red....lovely red. Grimmjow stare at me and kiss my lips with a great passion, when we parted he lick his lips to clean the blood off it. The warmth felt good. We took our clothes off and bathe in Gregg's puddle of blood as we made love again and again.

to be continue....

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