Nobody Can Hear You

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Lucy woke in the middle of the night from a dream of lightning- tall, thundering, sparks with spastic crackling, their wraithlike webbed electricity running wildly, consuming her entire being. She swung her legs over the side of her bed and went to the window that looked out over the woods. She searched blindly, looking for something that wasn't present.

The spruce trees loomed ominously, shadows flickering like dark monstrous creatures. Lucy's fingers hovered over the windows sheer curtains, her eyes widening when a particular shape formed. Her hands clutched onto the window pane, her bruising grip making the wood groan.

Her already narrowed brown and cerulean flecked eyes watched intently as the huge shape faded, and darkness engulfed the shadows of the forest once more. Her grip loosened; she had been wrong. Her eyes had been tricked, had been fooled into being preposterous. How could she have ever thought Laxus was there? 

She leaned her forehead against the cool glass of her window, allowing her eyes to close. He had been gone for nearly two months. She had been in some type of haze, drifting through life with no clear motivation or purpose. She was invited to re-join Team Natsu. At first, Lucy hadn't cared at all about that type of thing; She had been entirely too involved in her search for Laxus. Even after declining, Natsu pestered her endlessly. He had been spending an excessive amount of time with her, and she had begun to get irritated with him.

She had stayed stubborn though, not budging. She was a solo mage now. The same as she had always been. Working with people was too hard, as she came to realize. Doing things alone was oddly comforting and satisfying. 

"Laxus...why did you have to leave?..." Lucy whispered longingly, her eyes clenched shut.

She had been researching about what had happened to him, on the night he lost control. Her results had been very inconclusive, but one explanation had stood out to her. 

There was a potion, an old, banned potion, that enhanced a victim's emotions so much they could drive a person insane. But, she had found the only way to cure it was a complicated antidote, that she guessed the creator would know how to brew. Lucy had no idea who had given it to him, or who would want to ruin his life. Her mind was utterly blank, as she had no guesses as to who had a grudge against him. At least, one that bad.

Lucy couldn't help but wonder where he was. Was he safe? Was he even okay? The last time she had seen him, he had been terrifying. She had never seen such an evil, possessive side of Laxus before. 

Even though her last memory of him was unpleasant, she had a horrible feeling deep within herself. She missed him more and more each day, and it was different than the years she went without him when he was on Tenrou island. Now, she knew he was there. Somewhere, maybe near her, maybe somewhere far away.

She looked back at the forest, her dream flashing through her mind again. She had been having nightmares ever since his departure. She dreamt about a figure with radiant blonde hair, piercing cobalt eyes, and fists charged with lightning. She sometimes just dreamt about his electricity. The pain left behind after its shocking touch.

Lucy stared at the forest, and suddenly it seemed a lot less scary. She knew Jellal was down the hall, sleeping like a baby. She had only been confiding in him lately; She didn't quite feel like spending time with most people.

Lucy pressed her palm onto the smooth glass, her emotions raging. She just wished it would all go away. The agony, the searing pain in her heart. Like someone had ripped her heart out, their hands tearing at it like a thousand clawing demons. Like her heart had been savagely stomped on, the poor thing shattering on impact. Then someone had haphazardly attempted at sewing her broken beyond repair heart, and they had ended up with a lumpy, ugly heart, with the cuts pasted together messily.

The tears welled up in her eyes before she could do anything. They flowed down her cheeks like a raging waterfall, her tears making a glint in the moonlight. And before she knew it, her body was racked with sobs. She couldn't seem to stop, her pent-up sadness exploding like water breaking through a dam. There was only so much a person could bottle up before shattering.

She crumpled to the floor, hiding her head in the flannel pants of her knees. She quivered, her weeping calming down slightly, but you could still see the oncoming tears bursting from her eyes. It was like a faucet had been turned in her eyes; There was no clear end either.

Her eyelashes were thick with tears, but even past her blurry vision, she spotted the rain. She smiled bitterly, her eyes puffy. It seemed even the weather felt her pain.

She silently watched the raindrops patter against the window pane, before sliding gracefully down towards the ground. The rain got more intense, before becoming a raging downpour.

Lucy quietly rose to her feet, her tear tracks beginning to dry. She padded over to her forgotten bed and laid down softly. She snuggled into the creamy white sheets dotted with pale pink flowers. They were soft and silky against her face. She took a few deep breaths.

 Everything would be okay. At least, that's what she told herself. Maybe if she convinced herself enough it would become true. She just needed something to turn out positive for once in her life; For nothing to go awry. She threw her light pink comforter over herself, hiding under her covers. At least here, she could be alone. She didn't have to act happy or act like she was okay.

At least for a second, even if it was a small second, she felt content, maybe even happy. She knew it was a stretch, but as drowsiness started to overwhelm her, she felt like she might have a nightmare-less sleep. She had cried so much, that her body had used up all the emotion. She finally felt numb and peaceful. She could forget her problems, even if it was just for one night.

'Everything will be okay...'

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If only she knew.....

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