[Her] Beautiful Dream [BTS Fanfiction] ✓

LIX

Chapter Fifty-nine

I gently clutched the glass of water I was holding as I carefully leaned my arms on the waist-tall railing of the balcony, calmly sniffing the cold fresh air before staring down at those tiny shining cars to find the usual comfort but it never comforted me at all. I still felt so… I didn't know, I couldn't name it.

Naisip ko tuloy, hindi sapat ang isang baso lang ng tubig para pagaanin ang kung anumang nararamdaman ko. Isa pa, isang linggo na rin noong huli akong uminom at kaunti lang iyon. Maybe my heart just needed a little pour or maybe my heart was becoming greedier again. Baka kaya ako nasasaktan kasi nag-o-overboard na naman ako.

I should really accept that I didn't own all of his time. I was dating an idol, and his life was all about performing on stage, making good music and inspiring people. I was just a someone that spiced his busy life, someone that listed down as his least priority and I should be thankful for that.

My eyes slowly went up to the big billboard in front of me and I couldn't help but hardly pout my lips because my throat was hurting again. Pang-asar din talaga itong billboard na ito e. Hindi ba nito alam na puwedeng-puwede ko iyang ipaalis diyan? I wouldn't mind spending money and using connection just to get rid of it.

Sa dinami-dami naman kasi ng pupuwestuhan, bakit sa mismong harap pa ng bahay ko? Or I might say, sa dinami-rami ng klase ng billboard na puwedeng nandiyan, bakit iyan pa?

Inangat ko ang kanang kamay ko at tinakpan ang parte ng imahe ni Sally sa billboard. Sunod ay ipinikit ko ang kaliwang mata ko para ang guwapong image lang ni Jimin ang nakikita ko. I then sweetly smiled seeing the face of the most handsome man in my eyes.

Crap, I missed him so much!

"Miss na kita, alam mo ba iyon?" Parang tangang pagkausap ko sa picture niya. "Hindi ko alam kung paano mo ako natitiis ng ganito pero sige, iintindihin kong busy ka. Busy ka lang 'di ba, Jimin? Busy ka lang kaya hindi mo ako ma-contact. Maghihintay na lang ako ng tawag mo. Maghihintay ako kasi may tiwala ako sa'yo." Tumatango-tango ako na tipong mas ipinapa-intindi sa sarili ko ang lahat ng iyon.

Of course, I understood, I fully understood. It was just that my heart was having a hard time trusting but I really fully understood. I needed to.

"Argh. My head hurts, Chels," daing ko sa kalagitnaan ng pagdadaldal ni Chelsea. I had never hated her noisiness but I suddenly felt annoyed hearing her nonstop fusses. Hinawakan ko ang ulo ko saka marahang hinilot ang sentido ko. O baka sadyang naparami lang ako ng nainom kagabi kaya hindi ako nilulubayan ng hangover ngayon?

"May sakit ka ba?" nag-aalalang tanong niya sa akin habang tumatayo. Though even before she could reach me, I immediately shook my head.

"Wala akong sakit. I'm totally fine," simpleng sagot ko na lang sa kaniya ngunit hindi siya nagpa-awat.

Inilingan niya ako at nag-alalang nilapitan. "Who knows what you've been doing to yourself?" aniya sa tonong nanenermon. She again tried to put her palm on my forehead. Sinalat niya ang noo ko para alamin kung may sakit ba ako, maging ang leeg ko, hindi pa siya nakuntento dahil hinawakan niya pa ang magkabilang pisngi ko.

Chelsea was older than me, she always treated me like a younger sister. At oo, madalas kong maramdaman ang pag-aalaga niya, she must be a very thoughtful sister, kaso minsan ay sumosobra ang pag-aalala niya.

I rolled my eyes at her as I held her hand and slowly took them away from my face. "See?" I told her.

Bumalik siya sa upuan niya na bumubuntong-hininga at sa hitsura niya, mukhang hindi pa rin siya kumbinsido.  "You're not fine. You're cooler than me. Hindi normal iyon, Hanselle," OA niyang sabi.