"Go away Harry," Stevie muffles softly behind the thin door that stood between us. I slid down the door and kept my palms pressed up against it while I sunk to the floor.
"Stevie just let me explain, I promise I will tell you everything, please just give me a chance," I beg leaning my head against the cheap wood as a few more tears streamed down my face.
"You told me to trust you.... I trusted you," she cried quietly only audible to me as I pressed my ear against the door. I could feel the pain in her voice and it ripped through me like a silver bullet.
"Dada cry?" Kyla asked seeing me emotional as I sat attached to the door. She came and cuddled into my lap, gripping the shirt and holding me in her little arms.
"I know and I am a piece of shit for not opening up to you, I was just scared because I wasn't ready to lose you. I still am not ready to lose you," I plead with her hearing the soft little sobs come from the girl that I had broken. I caused destruction wherever I went these days and even though I didn't want to destroy Stevie I did. I was a hurricane and my path only lead to utter destruction, with only painful reminders in the wake of the storm.
I feel the support of the door collapse as I lean back and see Stevie who towers above me. I look up and see her once clear honey brown eyes cloud over with redness from her tears that irritated her vision. She drowns in one of my t-shirts that serves as an oversized dress on her small frame that I wanted to hold. She sinks to the floor and comes face to face with me, our faces are only inches away. Kyla slips from the hold she once had on me and I wipe a crystal tear falling from Stevie's cheek.
"I don't want to lose you either," She tells me crippling as she continues to cry softly to herself. "I trusted you, I thought for a second that this may be too good to be true and it turns out I was right. I was stupid to think my Prince Charming would whisk me away from my life, save me from my deadbeat town and the remnants of what was left of my father. I am native. He was right,"
"Give me a minute to explain, I will tell you everything. I know I wasn't who you thought I was but give me a chance to explain myself. If you don't want to be with me after that then I will let you go. Someone wise once said if you love something let it go, and I love you, Stevie,"
"I wish you wouldn't say things like that because it makes this ten times harder for me," Stevie says wiping at her tears that flowed gently down her soft face. She sniffles and sighs putting her face in her hands breaking her eye contact with me.
"Stevie please," I plead with her reaching for her but she pulls away.
"Don't come near me," She cries looking at me with those big hurt eyes that were cutting me up on the inside. She looked like a scared puppy that didn't know where to go or what to do, she was vulnerable and I was the cause of it all.
"Harry..." she says to me sniffling looking at me again, she sighs deeply and I do the same.
"You deserve so much better than me and I know that. You are special Stevie. In another life I would hope everything would have been different," I tell her seeing more tears pour down her face.
"I wish I could leave you, walk out that door right now... but I just can't," Stevie tells me, her voice shaky and unsteady as her sad eyes bore into mine. "I love you too Harry and because of that I am ready to listen,"
"Dada! Dada!" Kyla screams before she runs and lands into my arms with a big smile plastered across my face. She hangs on my neck and repeats my name over and over again trying her best to make me crack a slight smile. She smothers my face in slobbery kisses until I smile at her and kiss her back holding on tightly to my baby girl.
"I love you, baby," I tell Kyla who hugs me tighter and perches herself in my lap and stays put as I begin to tell Stevie everything. I start from the beginning, about how Layla broke my heart multiple times and behind her angel facade, she was the devil herself. She had shown me her true colors and no amount of our fake pearl smiles and empty I love you's could cover up the alcoholic disaster she was.
I told her about all the lies she pinned on me and how I eventually ended up at Honeymoon Inn. I laid everything out on the table for her, something I should have done a while ago but was too consumed by my own fears.
"I didn't tell you how I felt because you were the only thing that took me away, made me forget about what I had on my mind twenty-four seven. I know you thought I was someone else but I'm still that person you fell in love with," I conclude noticing Stevie had been listening intently, her glazed over eyes never left me. As I unfolded my story in front of her I watched her process every sentence I made sense of. Piece by piece I put together the jagged puzzle pieces until she was able to see the full picture clearly. I didn't know what she would think of me after I told her everything but I prayed she would understand.
"I don't even know what to say..." I rendered her speechless, she inhaled deeply and puts her head in her hands. "This is all so much to take Harry, I...."
"You don't have to say anything. I know I come with loads of baggage-"
"That is the understatement of a century," she scoffs standing up rolling her eyes. I follow suit and watch her roam the room breathing deeply trying to process everything I told her.
"God, the police are after us now! What the hell are we supposed to do? Where are we supposed to go when everyone is watching us, looking for us!" Stevie raises her voice out of stress. I pace towards her and and trace my gaze over her honey brown eyes that are filled with fear.
"I've got it handled-" I try but she shakes her head and combs her fingernails through her hair that strings out under stress.
"Harry we have been on the run, that's not handled. At any second this door could be broken down and they could take us away! That's not handled," Stevie says her breath increasing until she begins to hyperventilate.
"I promise I will keep us safe," I whisper to her holding her as I feel her heart racing against mine.
"Don't make a promise you can't keep," Stevie whispers into my ear her voice unsteady and laced with uncertainty. I can feel her tremble against my body, fear is wrecking havoc through her small frame as I hold her close.
"I won't," I tell her feeling her nuzzle her face into my shoulder.
N. Thoughts? What would you do if you were put into Stevie's position?!