Oneshots • Gawsten

crossfaded fanfic

it's 4:45am i'm so sorry i'm Fucked

okays so Geoff and Awsten are neighbors. right.

Awstens so fucking annoying. Awsten is like super nice and stuff obviously like he's awsten buuut he's so annoying. Not on purpose though.

Geoff's super cool normally, Je respects everyone and is so fucking nice like it's outstaaaanding but awsten pushes his fucking button okay he's so annoying lowkey but like kinda good bc he hurt but u know good

HE PLAYS CHRISTMAS MUSIC, IN JULY. J U L Y BABY,,,( AND MIKE HE.... HE LIKE BLASTS IT. BOPPING AND WHIPPING TO SANTA CLAISE IS COMING TO TOWN DUDE.

and geoff is SICK OF IT. so he like shows up to awstens door one day and he knocks like super loyd but not loud enough for the other apartment neighbors to hear bc geoff's nice. and he gives good hugs omg geoff hugs are better than nutting. like sorry if youve never hugged geoff but geoff hugs > orgasms. that's it.

ANYWAYS so geoff knocks bc he's tired of baby it's cold outside on repeat for 548737 hours. like he knows all the lyrics if awsten asked him to do a duet like in ELF he could buy like. dude wanna collab, nk oksh sorry basically geoff knocks bc hes SOOOO tired likesohldnt you be too??

i'm watching a weird ironic movie right now. anyways awsten opens the door bc he gets anxious if he doesn't be the answerer so obv he's like hello what u want. but like his purple hair flopped in his face and all i want for christmas is u is playing loudly in the background and geoff thought he'd be an old lady and not like. a hot twinky ass boy.

so geoff's like "yo, can u pls turn that shii down? i fuck w mariah carey skinny legend but i'm trying SHLEEP. and awsten's like srry but her a skinny queen needs that coint bc her career shrinking like her waist okurrrrrrrr.

and geoff replies w "you know what. that's fair. can i enjoy the skinny legend with u? and maybe SYVK UR DICK i meeeean christianly be ur BROSEPH u kno like joseph but bro."

and awsten's like HELL YA but u gotta join the skinny cult first

and geoff's like what the ducks a skinny cult does it mean u have to be unproblematic because if that's the case then ronnie radke can't be in it

so awsten's like "no you just have to worship her and her skinniness and like maybe a requirement is u havta smash me too but like. skinny queen mariah says it only applies to u."

geoffs ok with that

they live in the skinny cult for the rest of their lives and die there: that's all byeere i love frank!!!!!!