PATRIARCHY

nine

chapter 9

the twenty-third of may 2155

We walk slowly beside each other. The sky is now completely black and the only sources of light are coming from the street lamps branched along the freshly laid pavement.

He parked the car a few houses down, and I suspect it's because he wants to walk with me. Maybe that's wishful thinking. I just hope I didn't screw this up so bad that he has become completely uninterested. I don't think I have. But oh, he is so difficult to read. Half the time we were at the restaurant I was stuck wondering what he was thinking, if he enjoyed my company, just... something. But three hours later, he's still a complete mystery.

I wanted to keep that same level of mystery myself, so we would be on a leveled playing field, but whenever things got quiet I started rambling about myself until he stopped me. He even knows about the time I broke my toe when I was twelve.

Is this really all I get? Do I only get a few hours worth of interaction to decide if I want to spend the rest of my life with him? I mean, at least with Xander, I know what I'm getting myself into--I know who he is. But with Alden, the cold, collected, confident man I've met three times, I don't. I don't know him. I guess the only question left is; Do I want to?

"Alden, I want to ask you a question."

"Go ahead," he says. He stops walking, right under one of the streetlamps. I turn to him. Shoot – I should've had something prepared.

"Why did you want to call on me tonight?" I ask, and he leans his head against the streetlamp, his eyes skeptical. It looks as if he's wondering whether or not to answer me.

"I'm twenty-two, Amelia. I've put off claiming someone for four years, but time is running out for me. Ok?"

He starts walking again, and I scoff.

"I don't buy that," I say. He casts a surprised look at me over his shoulder and walks back into the light.

"You don't buy that?"

"Not really, no. You wanted to call on me because time is running out for you? If that were true, you'd pick a random girl at twenty-five and call it a day. You picked me for a reason, and I want to know what it was," I insist, my knees trembling. I know I shouldn't be this persistent, but I deserve answers if he expects me to choose him.

"If you are looking for some ethereal reason of why I'm interested, like 'something about your eyes makes me believe I could love you forever', you are not going to get it, Amelia. I wanted to meet with you because I find you interesting."

His words are firm and cold. His eyes darken and he starts walking again, slowly. Every piece of information I've gotten out of him just plants a million more questions. Plus, he finds me interesting? It's like he's out shopping, and he found me, a new brand of cheese in the aisle.

"So you won't make a decision based on love?" I ask fourthly as I catch up on him, refusing to stop. If he answered the last question, surely he can answer this one.

"If everyone made decisions based on love, we'd still be playing with sticks and stones. I am going to choose a female who I know will not hold me back in any way. Love would be a bonus, of course."

A bonus? He really does view this as some sort of business arrangement. Which it is, in some sense. He wants to know my qualifications, my exam score, to decide whether or not to hire me, in other words stand up on my ceremony. I take a soothing breath once I'm reminded that in the end, it'll be my choice. I get to choose between him and Xander. I don't know which seems worse.