60 | numb

242K 8.7K 2.3K
                                    

"I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
I'm becoming this, all I want to do
Is be more like me
And be less like you."

---

60 | numb

-Olivia-

Darkness engulfed me. It was the same kind of darkness one would have witnessed during a long sleep, or death. But surpringly, we never feel that darkness. Maybe because there are dreams and colourful motivations that kept us from observing this darkness.

That keep us from falling into the trap of it's calmness.

It felt good being like that. In oblivion, in emptiness, without any worry, without any fear. It was just me here. No one to bother me, no one to hurt me. I could float in this abyss of nothingness forever and ever.

But what would I achieve, nothing? What's a life without any accomplishments? What's a life without fears and failures? What's a life without an enemy and a weakness? What's a life without friends and strengths?

We wake up everyday to fight this world for a place in it, and we wake up everyday in anticipation of happiness.

So I had to wake up, I couldn't give up to this oblivion.

When I was 10, I remember, I had gotten into an accident. I had fought with my mom that day, gotten mad, sat on my tiny bicycle and went peddling down the lane to the woods.

Long story short, I had gotten into a collision with a bike and injured myself heavily. I remember having got a glass somewhere in my arm from the headlights of the bike and my father told me that it had to get operated otherwise it could cause an infection in my body.

He had given me a general anesthesia to lull my senses and make me go unconscious. I remember how relaxing that unconsciousness was.

It was different from all the times I had fainted otherwise.

Right now, I felt somewhat like how I felt during the anesthesia. This feeling is so addictive that I almost don't want to wake up.

But I forced my eyes to open up, but it took too much effort. They didn't want to wake up. My senses were dulled and my eyes refused to pick signals sent by my brain.

I tried again, and again till I felt like I was getting hold of my body. I felt like my struggle continued for hours, till the effects of the drug dulled away and my organs could take commands again.

My eyes fluttered open at last and disappointment filled my heart when I saw I was in some poorly lit, dark dungeon which smelled of bad water and death.

Why do dungeons always smell bad?

The only source of light in my room was the small window on top of a lateral wall that had been partially closed by metal rods.

Sunlight streamed into the room from there, making me wonder if this is as good as it gets, and it will be completely dark by night.

My eyes desperately looked around, to find someone, anyone to ask about what was happening.

My legs and arms were tied to a squeaky, old wooden chair, but my mouth was left open.

The Beta's Unwanted Mate | ✔️ CompleteWhere stories live. Discover now