Casting Bones

Chapter 5 - Part 2

If he didn't want to know that, then what did he want to know? He had so many questions, but even thinking about the possible answers made his stomach retch. It wasn't like Ashley was in a state to properly talk about this anyway, even more proof that she had no intention of telling him.

And neither was he. He'd never experienced anger like this before. He felt like he was going crazy in it. If they kept talking, it would take over his mouth and make him say things he didn't want to say. Maybe do things he didn't want to do.

He'd already put his hands on her...

"Get out."

Ashley had managed to keep her mouth closed for a painful few seconds now, but with his instruction she made a noise, like she'd choked on her shock. She looked out the window; Desi had stopped at the parking lot of a playground they always passed on the way home to Ashley's after school or parties. They were still a couple miles from her place.

"Desi, please..." Ashley stifled another sob, this time the sound of it coming out nervous. She exhaled, trying to gather herself, before continuing. "You're upset. And you have every right to be. And... and I'm sorry. But can we please just... can we just go to my place and talk abo—."

"I would rather drive this car into oncoming traffic than spend the night with you right now." Desi interrupted, trying to keep an outburst at bay. The careful tone of his voice was perhaps even more sinister though. He attempted to soften it with an added plea. "Get out of the car. Please."

Ashley swallowed hard, staring at him for a moment, then out the windshield again. It took her too long to work through her own panic as it began to settle around her. "How... how am I supposed to get home?"

"I don't know. Walk, I guess."

"I'll be walking for like, an hour."

Maybe she could use the time to figure out why she was such a whor— "It'll help you sober up."

"I can't I..." Ashley let her head fall back into her knees again, her next admission barely a whisper as she hid. "I already took the E, Desi. I can't be alone, I can't just... I'll pass out or, or something..."

The ecstasy. The pills that Desi had specifically said were for them both to have together. The pills he made her promise would be saved. Shared. Of course she took them herself. Of course she didn't wait for him. Selfish fucking cu— "Jesus Christ, Ashley..."

"I know! I'm sorry I just... I was so stressed out when you left. I thought it would help... I have a problem I think... I need to talk to someone or, like, see someone, you know?"

He'd heard her excuses before. Actually, it wasn't even something unique to her. He was pretty sure it was a sentiment most drug users shared at one point in their lives. The lowest point. The points that they got themselves too with stupid decisions and terrible behavior and the helping hand of a high to make them think it was all ok. Blame it on the narcotics. Couldn't possibly be that they were just shitty human beings.

Still... she wasn't wrong about being alone. She was probably already dehydrated if all she'd been drinking were cocktails. He really should take her home. As angry as he was, as much as he felt like he didn't give two shits about her right now, he knew that logical, reasonable Desi wouldn't want something bad to happen. He should just take her home, and drop her off, and maybe if he ever calmed down enough, they could consider having a conversation.

It wasn't so easy to listen to his own logic though, when it was barely a whisper compared to the the other thoughts screaming in his ears. Terrible, hateful things. Things he knew were not really his thoughts, but instead the voice of something angry and dark that he hadn't even known was living inside him. A snapping, drooling, feral hound in his gut that was waiting to lung at every word she said, and the muzzle hold he had on the animal was slipping with every second longer she spent in his passenger seat.

"Nic's place is just a few streets away, if you don't want to walk home." Desi managed to answer finally, his frustration slipping out onto his tongue as cold and callous.

He knew he'd hurt her, because the noise she made was like he'd sunk a knife into her belly. The tears she'd been fighting the whole time finally betrayed her and leaked out onto her cheeks. "Desi, please..."

He tried to care, to feel a lick of regret for being so cruel, but he just couldn't manage it. "Or, you can walk through the wood. Cuts the distance in half. Or you can take a fucking cab, or call your fucking parents, or a god damn ambulance if you think you're going to pass out. I don't care what the fuck you do, Ash, as long as it starts with getting the fuck out of my car."

She bit down on her lip when it started to quiver, swiping furiously at the wetness on her cheeks, then turned her expression to stone in hopes that it would keep more of them from falling. Once she managed to steady her breathing she unlocked her door, delivering her outrage as she got out of the vehicle. "Fine. I'd rather pass out in the gutter than stay in this piece of shit with you, anyway. Fucking asshole."

Desi was already putting the car into reverse before she'd even closed her door, but he waited until she'd slammed it shut and he was pulling away from her and back out onto the road before verbalizing the retort that he'd almost fired back at her.

"Bitch."