[ON HIATUS]
Who knew that love could be complicated. Nobody does. Not even God himself. But there's one person in the world who has experienced the pain in loving someone in the wrong way.
Namjoon's words echoed through Jin mind. Over and over again. It was a memory that he would never forget, even if he tried. Although, Jin wanted to be the one who started their relationship, but he was too late. But in either way, he felt so happy, relieved, and most of all, loved. Jin still couldn't believe that he had told him such words. He wanted to, but in reality, he didn't. Jin has had severe depression since he was in the 6th grade, which is considered second year in Middle School. Everyday, his mind kept telling him how terrible of a person that he actually was.
"You're not worth it." "You're never good enough for anyone." "You don't matter."
These mottos have been stamped in his brain for God knows how long. He has never told any of his friends, so he always kept them in his head. Besides of him venting on paper, he has not shown his true emotions to any other soul, other than himself.
—
Jin opened his eyes and woke up to the sound of vibration. "Mmmgh.." He grunted. He hated being woken up, especially by other people. Once his consciousness has entered his brain, he immediately knew what woke him up from his beauty sleep. His phone. He then unlocked it with his fingerprint and read what was sent to him:
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Oh yeah. He totally forgot about the meetup that all five friends planned. As soon as he realized that he had the arrangement today, he hopped out of bed. The warmth that was sitting on Jin's lower half of his body slowly faded away and was replaced with cold air that was produced from his ceiling fan. As soon as he escaped the comfort of his bed, he rushed to the closet and opened the doors.
"Hmmm... What should I wear? I mean, we're going to an amusement park, so it can't be all fancy.. But, I want to look good! I want to impress them.. Especially Namjoon." Jin has always been insecure about his looks. He always wants to look nice and pleasing. His worst nightmare is to repeal people away from him. After long and hard thoughts, he went with a simple and lively outfit. Perfect for the occasion. When he was finished getting dressed, he turned 90° and went straight towards the bathroom. He put a nurdle of toothpaste on his bright pink brush and started to scrub his shiny white teeth. As he was cleaning, he hummed "Screen" by Twenty One Pilots, a song that Jon showed him a while back.
Ever since Jin's parents moved to America for business purposes, Jin has always felt like a bystander, a monster, and abnormal. He was the only Korean, besides other Freshman and Sophomores, in his school. On the very first day of his brand new school, he embarrassed himself like he's never done before. When it was his time to introduce himself, he spoke:
"안녕하세요! 체 이름을 김 석진 이에요. ((a/n: which translates to: hello! my name is kim seokjin.))"
As soon as his words echoed throughout the class, people started to whisper to their neighbors as they stared at him. His warm, dorky smile changed to a worrisome one. He started to get very nervous and fidgeted with his stuff. Soon, the teacher whispered,
