The past decade has been the worst experience of my life but the most amazing time, I've got to see my kids grow up into the strong independent adults they are now, yet the only person I want to share the happiness with is their mother.
My one true love.
It all started on that heart wrenching day was raining heavily in the middle of October, the golden crisp leaves now acted as a umbrella in the torrential rain and the sound of the water hitting the roof was so peaceful . All four of us were sat inside cuddling up on the couch. I was playing with Maisie, She was so beautiful! Her long curly blonde hair bouncing from left to right as she ran around the living room, the excitement in her icy blue eyes as she looked back on me chasing her, they were so and innocent smile beamed, she has a whole life ahead of her the world is her oyster I questioned what she would become in the future, in that moment I would of given anything for time to stay still.
What I would give to have that pure smile back on my little girl's face.
Then it all started to go wrong.
It all started when my son was 6 Months old
My gorgeous wife was feeding my son Mason when she started to flinch every time he latched on. I stopped playing immediately quickly rushing to her aid.
"It hurts every time he tries to feed Logan, I think something's wrong" Liv said nervously
I kiss her gently on the forehead and stroke masons tiny head, is light brunette hair curling around my finger.
" We will go to the doctor on Monday and go from there" I said calmly trying not to cause more stress.
But by the time we did, it was too late.
A few months passed and she now refused to breastfeed Mason. She began to loose weight, dark circles seeped around her eyes and the colour drained from her hair. She just said to me she was tired and that's why.
She began throwing up every morning and then sleeping all day she couldn't get out of bed for more than 10 minuets without feeling weak.
I remember all the doctors rushing in one morning. I'd woke up if done the usual dad duty's before coming back to bed to wake up my beautiful wife. I kissed her pale lips before lifting up the blanket to find she was in a pool of her own blood which was soaking in the bedsheets.
What was even worse was she wasn't responding.
I call out an ambulance before ringing Liv's Mom and Dad to look after the kids. The paramedics on the phone was convinced she was having a miscarriage.
My heart aches as I picked her almost lifeless body from the sheets and kissed her in my arms. The tears wouldn't stop I couldn't do anything to help her.
Finally the paramedics came and shortly after so did Liv's parents who were also very concerned and distressed for their only daughter. We got into the cold ambulance and waited to get to the hospital. The journey there seemed like the longest trip of my life yet looking back I wish it never ended.
She was immediately rushed off out of my sight and I was left in the hospital waiting room, desperate for answers.
Five miserable hours passed when a small doctor walked up to me and asked me to join him in the room where she was being kept.
I follow him promptly asking him so many questions which he didn't answer. He opened the door to reveal my beautiful wife hooked up to so many machines with tubes coming out of her from everywhere. I rush over to her unconscious body and kiss her head still unable to stop the tears.
The doctor placed one hand on my shoulder and asked me to take a seat.
"I'm afraid I have some bad news Mr Paul about your wife." He looked like he was going to cry himself.
Unable to speak I just nod.
"Olivia has suffered a uterus infection from a miscarriage mostly put on by the fact that she has a Stage 3 Tumour in her right breast which would of been causing a lot of stress and pain in so sorry Mr Paul but we've put her in an induced coma as she doesn't have long left"
I wanted the ground to swallow me up that day. What I'd give to switch places but on this day to hear my eighteen year old daughter say to me that she wish it was her broke he even more. I just wanted to take the pain away.
Mason spites me and wish's i was dead and my daughter wants to die. And they say parenting is easy.
I embraced my daughter as she cries into my chest.
I look her in the eyes and say.
"You know the day you was born was the best day of my life, you and your brother are the best thing to ever happen to me and although I would do anything to have your mother back I wouldn't change the amazing young woman you've become today Mai. Since the first time I held you I knew you was the best thing to happen in the whole world, I am so proud of you". I held her in my arms like I did at the hospital the first day I met her.
Suddenly we was interrupted by a loud shout from behind us.
It was my son Mason, he saw his sister crying and ran full force into her.
"Don't cry Mai I know what this is about and. I just want to say I'm sorry" he wiped a tear from his sisters face,m before turning to me.
" Dad I'm sorry for they way I treat you I just feel like I could of done something I blame myself for Mom going" I put both hands on my sons shoulders
" Son it was not your fault and I know for a fact your mom loves you both and is so proud of you and so am I".
We all embrace eachother in the field of grass outside our house before I wrap my arms around both of my kids.
"How about we go inside and look at some photo albums?" I suggest.
"I'd like that" Maisie said wiping the tears away from her eyes.
"Me too Dad" Mason replied before we all started walking towards our house. The sun began to set and birds could be heard chirping in the distance.
"Why did they call you a Savage?"
"My son, that's a whole different story".
***The end ***
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Savage - Logan PaulFanfiction
#1 Most Popular Logan Paul Book of 2017 #3 in Fanfiction 26/08/2017 ****CURRENTLY IN EDITING AFTER 2 YEARS**** Pregnancy can be hard for any women in any situation ... but what if you was pregnant with Logan Paul's baby? Liv White was awkward...