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Dedicating this chappie to lilly-rain. I love your stories and i hope you write more. :)
I woke up, not from my alarm clock, but from my phone vibrating. Man do I hate Mondays. Monday is the day when everyone’s reluctant to go back to school after having a relaxing break from said school.
Grumpy and still half-asleep, I checked my phone and found, to my surprise, a text from none other than Chase.
Hey, u awake?
Still stunned from getting a text, I typed back. Yeah
Cool. Imma pik u up 4 skool kay?
Sure, what time?
Around 8. C u then. ;)
I checked my alarm clock. Okay, I still have a half hour to spare. No need to rush. Groaning, I stretched, reaching out to my alarm clock so it doesn’t ring when the set time hits. I walked into the bathroom, showering off the sleepiness. I brushed my teeth and went out to change into a bunch of random clothes: a thin black turtle neck sweater, black thin hoodie, random boxers, black skinny jeans, and black high top converses. Since I have a turtle neck on, I don’t need a bandana or a scarf to cover up the scar. I went to my nightstand and slipped on my glasses.
Aunt Claire had the early shift today, so she already left, leaving me alone. I took my time making breakfast when the doorbell rang. I turned the stove to low heat before going over to the door.
Chase looked amazing in his gray t-shirt, school jacket, navy blue jeans and blue vans. He scanned me up and down. When his eyes landed on my glasses, he frowned. “You have your glasses on?”
I sighed. “Would you like to come in? I made breakfast.”
At the word breakfast, his stomach growled. “That sounds great.” He stepped in, following the scent of food until he reached the kitchen.
I handed him a plate of bacon, eggs and pancakes with maple syrup. I poured coffee into a mug and slid it towards him, sitting down to nibble on my portion, which wasn’t much. I usually make a lot since Aunt Claire is always here.
Finished with his breakfast, he laid back on the counter, sipping the coffee. “Man that was good. I should come over more often to eat.” He patted his now full stomach, tipping the coffee to guzzle down the entire thing.
I washed the dishes, checked the stove to see if it’s turned off all the way, checked all of the rooms and doors to see if it’s locked, got Smores to climb into my bag along with both of our lunches, and locked the door behind me before I headed into Chase’s car.
It’s unsettling when every single person has their eyes trained on you. We arrived at school, Chase’s engine catching everyone’s attention. He got out of the car, everyone still acting normal with the usual ‘was sups’ and ‘hey’, but when he came over to my side of the car and opened my door, all eyes trained towards me. Mouths were opened, eyes widened, all conversations ceased. It’s kind of freaky.
I gulped nervously, my legs shaky from the amount of attention I’m receiving. This was a bad idea. I should’ve never let Chase drive me to school. What was I thinking? I told myself on the first day I moved back here to try to stay invisible, not attract attention and here I am, with everyone’s eyes on me and Chase.
“Hey, hey. Just calm down. Breath.” Chase rubbed his palm on my back, trying to sooth me. I never noticed I was having a panic attack. I took in one big, shaky breath, then let it all out. I repeated the process, subduing the panic attack until it was tolerable. With shaky legs, I put one foot out, then the other, standing up with my bag clutched tightly against my body. Smores climbed out before I could squish him, climbing up to my hooded head.
I took one step, but my shaky legs couldn’t hold me. My knees buckled, descending me face first to the hard ground. Strong arms caught me before my face became intimate with the ground.
Chase brought me back to my feet, slamming the door with his free arm. “You okay?”
“Y-yeah.” I quickly stepped away from his arms, moving away from him so we aren’t touching.
A flash of hurt appeared on his face. I opened my mouth to say something, but nothing came out. What should I say? Sorry for not wanting to be with you in public? Sorry that I can’t stand the unwanted attention I received just from being with you? Sorry I’m broken person? No.
Chase’s hand suddenly grasped mine as I was about to make a run for it. “Alan, don’t run away from me. I know you have a lot of problems that you haven’t told me, but all know is that I will stick with you so you don’t have to shoulder the burden of the nightmares that haunt your eyes.” He growled, tightening his grip. How did he know? “Lean on me. I’m your friend, maybe more. I want to help shoulder the burdens that hunch your shoulders, the sadness and pain that dulls your eyes, the nightmares that bring those bags under your eyes. Just…” He clenched his teeth, slowly calming down. “Just let me in.”
Maybe I’m stupid, that I’m not thinking right, but all I know is that I want the pain to stop, even if it’s just for a moment. I leaped into his arms, burying myself into his chest, letting his warmth heat up my cold body. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me in place, trapping me in his strength, his kindness.
The bell rang, signaling the start of school. With great reluctance, I let go of him, unwrapping my arms from his torso. The warmth I gained from him lingered, leaving me toasty warm. I pulled away, about to go to the school building when I realized, he never let go of my hand. He tugged me back towards him.
We walked hand in hand to our lockers, taking out our books, before going to class. Does this mean we’re a couple now? He did say he’s a friend, but he also said he might be more. We’re also holding hands like a couple and I know guys who are friends with other guys do not hold hands unless they are dating and we did go on a date. Does that automatically make us boyfriend and boyfriend? Or does that put us in the very friendly/weird friend section?
Everyone stares at us when we both came in hand in hand. Chase ignored the stares, bringing us to our table. When we were finally seated, he glared at everyone who was brave enough to keep staring then gave them a bright smile. One thing’s for sure, that smile is not a happy one. Everyone looked away, no one speaking at all. Mr. Portland was happy about that, smiling in triumph, as if he was the one who shut everyone up.
A t the end of class, Chase walked me to my next one, his presence impossible to ignore. He glared at everyone who gave us the funny eye, which was everyone we passed in the hall and in the classrooms. My new bodyguard?
Before I took a step into my next class, he pulled me back, turning my body so I faced him, and landed a peck on my forehead. I heard a faint squeal, but I didn’t bother caring since my attention was all on the person who gave me PDA, an outcast who was kissed by the king.
“I’ll see you at lunch okay?” He ruffled my hair affectionately, winking. He sidestepped me, his hands in his pockets as he strode down the hall with confidence and cockiness fit for a king like him.
My mouth wide open, I walked into the classroom, shocked from Chase’s kiss, even if it was just a simple kiss on the forehead, and the warmth from that small sign of affection that enveloped me from head to toe. I plopped my dazed self onto my seat, not even caring about the eyes that snapped towards me. Whispers about me and Chase came up a few seconds after. News travels fast.
A hand slammed onto my desk. I yelped in surprise and fear. Already thinking for the worst, I cringed back into my seat, my arms up to protect me from any beating that will come my way. I closed my eyes and waited for the pain, clenching my teeth.
“Oh gosh. I’m sorry for scaring you Alan. I didn’t mean to.” Melissa’s voice, full of guilt, said to me instead of the pain I thought was going to get.
Cautiously, I opened up one eye just enough to see what was in front of me, but not enough for anyone to notice. Melissa, confused and worried, stared at me, a frown on her lips. Forcing my body, still in it’s fight or flight mode, to relax or at least fake it, I put my arms down, settling back into my seat.
“What was it that I wanted to talk to you about?” Melissa tapped a finger on her chin in thought. “It was something about you…” She snapped her fingers, finally figuring out what was on her mind. That was when she squealed, jumping in place while she clapped her hands rapidly. Wincing from the noise, I covered my sensitive ears. “OMG, I saw you and Chase and that kiss…” She drawled, wagging her eyebrows at me.
All the blood went to my face. I lifted my turtle neck until the part that covered my neck now covered my mouth, trying to hide my smile and blush. The image of Chase kissing my forehead and the almost kiss on our date flashed before my eyes, causing me to blush even more. Fudge duddy. I must look like a tomato.
Melissa went to her table and scooted it over to mine, our tables colliding. “I forgot to bring my textbook.” She explained when she noticed my confusion. She leaned towards me, glancing in all directions. “Spill it. Are you guys like boyfriend and boyfriend? Did you go on a date yet? Did you guys kiss? Have sex? When did you get together?” She whispered, shooting me questions like a machine gun.
Chase loved it when I spoke, so maybe I can with Melissa too. She’s really nice, funny, and she would hang out with me than her popular friends, even with my reputation here, and yes, I heard what everyone’s saying about me. You can’t expect me not to hear when I’m right next to you or passing by. Stupidity thy name is gossipers.
“I don’t know. Yes. No. No. I think on Saturday.” I whispered back.
Melissa squealed again, a huge grin taking up most of her face. I can feel the eyes trained at thee two of us, but I tried my best to ignore it. “You guys are just so cute together and I just…” She laughed. “I’m such a fan girl for gay couples. I mean, isn’t just hot seeing two good looking guys kissing? Showing affection?” She had a far off look in her eyes. “I wish I were a guy, then I can find some hot hunk of a man and go all gay for him, but it’s too bad I was born with boobs and a vagina than a penis.” She sighed. “Being a girl sucks.”
I chuckled softly, nodding in agreement. I would never volunteer to be a girl. Why would I want to deal with pregnancy, menstrual cycles, bras, panties, and so much emotion? I have enough shiz to deal with. I don’t need to add another to break the camel’s back, or in this case, my life.
Melissa snapped out of her dream world and directed her attention at me. “So, how was your date?”
Fidgeting with the sleeves of my sweater, I told her. “He picked me up and drove me to a secluded place by a pond with a picnic table, chairs, candles, and food. We talked about ourselves. Then we went to the next city over and watched ‘The Avengers’,” I didn’t want to tell her about Mike. The thought of him sent chills down my body, “After that we went to eat ice cream at a park and he drove me back home.”
“Nawww, that’s just so cute. Never in my life had I thought Chase would do something this romantic and sweet with someone he’s with. His past girlfriends and boyfriends were really short and just physical, well that’s what I heard. I guess this shows he really likes you.”
Hearing that sent my heart soaring, bringing the hopes that I thought was crushed from years of hurt and betrayal, to spark again. “Really?” I kept my tone soft and neutral, hiding the excitement bubbling up inside myself.
Melissa nodded, confident with her answer. “The only he ever did something like this, scratched that, remotely like this was with this girl in the eighth grade, and it was only to help get her boyfriend jealous.” She crunched up her nose. “She turned into a bitch who hates me for some reason. I have no idea why.”
I shrugged. “Maybe it’s because you’re naturally pretty, fun, and kind while she’s, what you said, a bitch.” As I said, I hate judging someone, especially someone I’ve never met, but I voiced out my opinion and to me, it’s all truth.
Melissa burst into surprised laughter, “Thanks. Amanda’s a slut and a hateful person. I wonder what made her that way? She was never like this before.” She gave me a pitiful look, confusing me more. “I guess you should know. Chase and Amanda are what you call ‘fuck buddies’. Given how much of a slut she is and how Chase would go for anyone willing, I just think it’s disgusting. But I can see why he would go for that bimbo. Long blond hair, big brown eyes, huge rack, small waist, and an ass that any girl would envy.”
The happiness I felt was crushed from the image that came into my mind. It was of Chase coming out of the boy’s bathroom with that mean slut. A seed of doubt was planted into my heart. Did they like each other? Does he really like me? Are we really together or is that just something I conjured in my head? Tears started to build up, blurring my vision. Does he only want me for my body like the rest of the people he was with? Does he only want me for sex? And if he does get what he wants, I said if not when because I’m not ready to take that leap, will he toss me into the group of people he had sex with and go for someone else?
Melissa continued on talking, not even noticing my distress, “But it’s only physical. It’s not like that with you two. I can see it in his eyes that he really cares and if you guys didn’t have sex on the first date, or even kiss, then he really does have feelings for you, strong feelings.”
Hearing those words washed the most of the doubt out of my mind, but that seed will always be there in my heart, waiting to either grow or shrivel up and compost. When he didn’t kiss me, I thought it was because he didn’t think of me in a romantic way, but in a friend way. It’s been a long time since I had a friend so I don’t remember what a friend does or if it changes as you age.
Melissa kept talking. “Not that I know everything about romance since I never had a boyfriend, but just be careful. I’ve known Chase since elementary school and he can be.. Well just be careful.”
I gently placed my hand on top of hers and gave it a gently squeeze. She froze for a moment, staring at our hands. Did I do something wrong? What if she doesn’t like people touching her like me? Oh gosh.
I was about to take my hand away when she got out of her seat to give me a gently hug. Hey, I’m not disgusted by her touching me. Does this mean I can trust her too? As people say, the mind is the logical one, the heart’s the emotional, and the body’s the instinctual one. When it all comes down to it, the body knows best when it comes down to these things.
Class ended with Melissa walking me to my next class, hugging me before she left to go to her own. Right when I reached for the doorknob, someone yanked me back, throwing onto the floor. I slid until the cold metal of the lockers collided with my spine. My head slammed hard on the hard surface, the locker rattling from the impact, along with my equilibrium.
Blinking away the stars, a few pairs of legs came into my line of vision or maybe it’s just one and the others were just illusions. I don’t know. My brain’s still jumping on the walls of my skull. The pain didn’t help. Nope, not at all.
Is it just me or did I imagine the leprechaun from Lucky Charms skip away in a muumuu?
A hand fisted onto the lapels of my sweater, lifting me up before slamming back against the lockers. From the corner of my eyes I can see people crowding around, taking pictures, talking in whispers, watching, some of them cheering us on. The crowds grew until a huge blockade of people stood in my way towards freedom.
A fist connected with my gut, forcing the oxygen out of my lungs from the impact. My experience on Lucas survival 101 kicked in. I brought my leg up, kicking the person in the nuts while using my elbow to crush his face. I’m not usually a violent person, but when you are always in these situations, you have to learn or wake up in pain and in your own blood.
Smores, doing his duty as a bodyguard jumped the guy, scratching the hell out of his face. I don’t know who he is, but all I can tell is that he’s a jock and that he wants to hurt me. His buddies came to his rescue, trying to capture Smores. He dodged all of their hands, doing his own damage.
Now in full blown fight or flight mode, my body chose fight and so I did. My body numb, I couldn’t feel the punches and kicks that connected. The only I had in mind was just to fight. I didn’t know what I was doing, everything a blur of action, but I know I was losing. There were just too many and they’re stronger than me. No way will I win this fight.
A fist came right my face, too late for me to dodge. Stars and an explosion of pain radiated from my face. Splotches of black dotted my vision. Oh god, please don’t make me lose consciousness. If I do, they can do worse damage and I don’t even know if Smores is alright.
The darkness grabbed with it’s many hands, pulling me into the abyss. The last thing I saw before everything turned black was someone with blue spikes bursting through the crowd, along with a person with the most loveliest steel gray eyes, and his buddy joining the fray.
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